• i was talking to my friend brandi last night for a long time, it is so crazy, she is in a similar situationtaht me and swan aer in,w ell there are a lot of differences but she is doing the same as her, it is crazy, we talked a lot about her situation, there is a lot of crazy stuff, a lot of different stuff, but when she mention something very similar then it was crazy, it was like peering into the other side of it all, we also talked abou how guys and girls go about things different, how the two minds work, very interesting stuff, how stuff like this effects both sides and why us guys do what we do, we have such a hard time trusting the flow of things, we want now ands thats all we see, because you arent garenteed tomarrow, women put a lot more trust of the flow, it is easier to comprehend, adn that is just how it is, adn well i am starting to adapt to the idea of the flow, trust is a very difficult thing to give, but here i think i can give trust, we also talked about like freshmen year, how much more care free me and brandi were, neither of us ever walked into school depressed or down or anything like that, it was take it one day at a time simple, we were not shown what we have been, adn although i agree with her the wish for the simple times, none the less this all is part of the evolution of ourselves, adn even though last school year and freshmen year i had none of this to deal with, it was easier to wake up each day and go to school, and everything, i think all that has happend to me in the last 5 months i would trade for nothing else, truely were the best times of my life, and well i know it all sorta sucks right now, i know the prize is huge adn very much well worth it all, you know it was crazy, we talked so much but the end of the conversation was very strange, at least on my side, she said that befor i got into this relationship seh always new i was a good guy,b ut seeing how i treated it, what i was willing to do, and my understanding of what is going on now and what i have to do for her at this point and stuff she said taht even though i strangly never really had a relationship before, i treat this only like i have been in 100 before, or at least my mindset is, and she well said how mush i will enpact someones life, it she said she has no right to say who, she said it could be swan adn probably but seh has no idea, adn she said whoever will be happy adn all this stuff, telling me the empact i am to make on people, it is crazy, i havent heard that for the first time but it is a shock to hear,every time, crazy stuff to think about, well anyway it was good to talk to her again, brandi has a lot of family crap and life crap todeal with and i wish her the best with it all, because her situation seems to be even more complicated,

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