I think much like another song “Anti-Matter” (that's also on the same album as this song), this one is also is inspired by a horrifying van crash the band experienced on Nov 3, 2022. This, much like the other track, sounds like it's an extension what they shared while huddled in the wreckage, as they helped frontman Garrett Russell stem the bleeding from his head wound while he was under the temporary effects of a concussion. The track speaks of where the mind goes at the most desperate & desolate of times, when it just about slips away to all but disconnect itself, and the aftermath.
What do I do to ignore them behind me?
Do I follow my instincts blindly?
Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams
And give into sad thoughts that are maddening?
Do I sit here and try to stand it?
Or do I try to catch them red-handed?
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?
Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I'm lost within
I put on my daily façade but then
I just end up getting hurt again
By myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
If I turn my back I'm defenseless
And to go blindly seems senseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on
Then they'll take from me 'til everything is gone
If I let them go I'll be outdone
But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun
If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer
By myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
How do you think
I've lost so much?
I'm so afraid
I'm out of touch
How do you expect
I will know what to do
When all I know
Is what you tell me to
Don't you (know?)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside
Don't you (know?)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
Do I follow my instincts blindly?
Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams
And give into sad thoughts that are maddening?
Do I sit here and try to stand it?
Or do I try to catch them red-handed?
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?
Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I'm lost within
I put on my daily façade but then
I just end up getting hurt again
By myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
If I turn my back I'm defenseless
And to go blindly seems senseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on
Then they'll take from me 'til everything is gone
If I let them go I'll be outdone
But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun
If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer
By myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why, but in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
How do you think
I've lost so much?
I'm so afraid
I'm out of touch
How do you expect
I will know what to do
When all I know
Is what you tell me to
Don't you (know?)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside
Don't you (know?)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
I can't hold on
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
To anything, watching everything spin
With thoughts of failure sinking in
Lyrics submitted by Matt, edited by xender for, if ur 555 im 6(sic)6
By Myself Lyrics as written by Chester Charles Bennington Brad Delson
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Lyrics powered by LyricFind
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Quite simply this song is about having very low self-esteem, that's why it rings true with so many of us. It's about being caught in that catch-22 of attempting to just be yourself but getting devoured for such vulnerability or otherwise faking it in order too impress the crowd but losing connection with yourself and compromising your own identity. Basically either being hated by the crowd or being hated by yourself but either way losing because you are aware of the problem but have no idea of the solution thus thoughts of failure sinking in. I don't know of another song that captures so well the private hell introspective people with such low self-esteem go through. If this song resonates with you then please read up on self-esteem and make it a focus of your study. I have done and am very happy to say that I have moved on from the feelings of this song. I listened to it today and cried over how much pain I used to be in. Don't worry even if you gain self-esteem you will still enjoy this song, it just won't indulge your anger as much.
One up! This person gets it.