So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
You always wanted a lover
I only wanted a job
I've always worked for a living
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
I come here looking for money
Got to have it
And end up leaving with love, oh, oh
Now you've left me with nothing
Can't take it
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
I bought you drinks, I brought you flowers
I read you books and talked for hours
Every day, so many drinks
Such pretty flowers, so tell me
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I
Since you went away I've been hanging around
I've been wondering why I'm feeling down
You went away, it should make me feel better
But I don't know, oh
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
You always wanted me to be something I wasn't
You always wanted too much, oh, oh
Now I can do what I want to, forever
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
At night, the people come and go
They talk too fast, and walk too slow
Chasing time from hour to hour
I pour the drinks and crush the flowers
What have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I
Since you went away I've been hanging around
I've been wondering why I'm feeling down
You went away, it should make me feel better
But I don't know, oh
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? Tell me (what have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, ahh (what have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
Gonna get through
Gonna get through
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
I'm gonna get through, right?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't have to fall apart (what have I, what have I)
We don't have to fight (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't need to go to hell and back (what have I, what have I)
Every night (what have I done to deserve this?)
You never ever love me (what have I, what have I)
Can you think of me? (What have I done to deserve this?)
Ohh-oh (what have I, what have I)
Babe (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't have to fall apart (what have I, what have I)
We don't have to fight (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't need to go to hell and back (what have I, what have I)
Every night (what have I done to deserve this?)
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Ooh baby
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
Ow, how am I gonna get through?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Baby yeah
How I'm gonna get through?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Ooh-ooh
How I'm gonna get through?
I only wanted a job
I've always worked for a living
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
I come here looking for money
Got to have it
And end up leaving with love, oh, oh
Now you've left me with nothing
Can't take it
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
I bought you drinks, I brought you flowers
I read you books and talked for hours
Every day, so many drinks
Such pretty flowers, so tell me
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I
Since you went away I've been hanging around
I've been wondering why I'm feeling down
You went away, it should make me feel better
But I don't know, oh
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
You always wanted me to be something I wasn't
You always wanted too much, oh, oh
Now I can do what I want to, forever
How am I gonna get through?
How am I gonna get through?
At night, the people come and go
They talk too fast, and walk too slow
Chasing time from hour to hour
I pour the drinks and crush the flowers
What have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?
What have I, what have I, what have I
Since you went away I've been hanging around
I've been wondering why I'm feeling down
You went away, it should make me feel better
But I don't know, oh
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through? Tell me (what have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, baby? (What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
How I'm gonna get through, ahh (what have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
Gonna get through
Gonna get through
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
I'm gonna get through, right?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't have to fall apart (what have I, what have I)
We don't have to fight (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't need to go to hell and back (what have I, what have I)
Every night (what have I done to deserve this?)
You never ever love me (what have I, what have I)
Can you think of me? (What have I done to deserve this?)
Ohh-oh (what have I, what have I)
Babe (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't have to fall apart (what have I, what have I)
We don't have to fight (what have I done to deserve this?)
We don't need to go to hell and back (what have I, what have I)
Every night (what have I done to deserve this?)
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Ooh baby
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?)
Ow, how am I gonna get through?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Baby yeah
How I'm gonna get through?
(What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?) Ooh-ooh
How I'm gonna get through?
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