Go ahead push your luck
Find out how much love the world can hold
Once upon a time I had control and reined my soul in tight

Well the whole truth
Is like the story of a wave unfurled
But I held the evil of the world
So I stopped the tide froze it up from inside
And it felt like
A winter machine that you go through and then
You catch your breath and winter starts again
And everyone else is spring bound

And when I chose to live
There was no joy it's just a line I crossed
It wasn't worth the pain my death would cost
So I was not lost or found
And if I was to sleep

I knew my family had more truth to tell
And so I traveled down a whispering well
To know myself through them

Growing up my mom had a room full of books
And hid away in there
Her father raging down a spiral stair
Till he found someone, most days his son

And sometimes I think
My father, too, is a refugee
I know they tried to keep their pain from me
They could not see what it was for
But now I'm sleeping fine

Sometimes the truth is like a second chance
I am the daughter of a great romance
And they are the children of the war

Well, the sun rose
With so many colors it nearly broke my heart
It worked me over like a work of art
And I was a part of all that

So go ahead push your luck
Say what it is you gotta say to me
We will push on into that mystery
And it will push right back
And there are worse things than that
'Cause for every price
And every penance that I could think of
It's better to have fallen in love
Than never to have fallen at all

'Cause when you live in a world
Well it gets in to who you thought you'd be
And now I laugh at how the world changed me
I think life chose me
After all


Lyrics submitted by aur0ra

After All Lyrics as written by Dar Williams

Lyrics © BMG Rights Management

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After All song meanings
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9 Comments

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  • +3
    General Comment

    This song is about recovering from major depression. About trying to fight the chaos of life by trying to control things and isolating from life. I think "I chose to live" has double meaning. It is recognizing the selfishness in suicide, but I think it also means choosing to recover and live life fully.

    The family stuff is a lot about how you inherit your ways of thinking from your parents. Although parents try to protect you from the pain they have had in their life, they still teach you coping mechanisms that may not all be positive. It's important to understand them in understanding yourself. "Children of the war" has double meaning. Her parents were probably literally children during WWII, but it also refers to "the war inside", battling emotional issues like anxiety and depression.

    It ends with a very positive message that its important to experience life, take some chances. There will be disappointments, but it'll be worth it. Embrace the chaos of life.

    darfon June 04, 2006   Link

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