It's Not

It's about depression - how your life can seem so perfect, so wonderful, but it isn't. Not to you, not when you're struggling against that disease and your whole life is a "tiny dot". You don't know where the depression came from, and people think that it should be so easy to get out of it ("and all I have to do is to press the pedal") but it isn't. It's not. You get into a relationship, thinking love will make it better... but it doesn't.

Correction to the last verse:

So, baby, kiss me like a drug, like a respirator And let me fall into the dream of the astronaut Where I get lost in space that goes on forever And you make all the rest just an afterthought And I believe it's you who could make it better Though it's not No, it's not No, it's not

this song is so incredibly perfect..."so baby kiss me like a drug, like a respirator..." is my favorite line from this song, and it is also one of the main themes of her album, addictive relationships (whether it be sex addiction or simply giving the other person magical qualitites like only they can make you better). Aimee Mann is an amazing woman.

it's perfect. reminds me of realities of life.

fav lines,

so baby kiss me like a drug, like a respirator and let me fall into the dream of the astronaut for I'll get lost in space that goes on forever

I heard this song on some random ep of dawson's creek and loved it stright away. bought the cd so many years ago (i think i was like 16 at the time). it still stands as one of my favs. i sung it to my baby neice the other day, not the lyrics just the melody and she totally stopped fussing and calmed down. it was weird. aimee has an awesome effect on those of us lucky enough to let her in.

I think this song powerfully depicts how if feels when you are trapped in an abusive relationship and are realizing you need to leave. The lyrics describe the increasing awareness of needing to leave and the conflict of the emotional paralysis that keeps you to stay and remain stuck in the cycle.

1.  “I keep going round and round on the same old circuit. / A wire travels underground to a vacant lot. / Where something I can’t see interrupts the current.”

This reminds me of the cycle of abuse, with the “same old circuit” symbolizing the repetitive nature of destructive relationship patterns. The “vacant lot” where something unseen disrupts the “current” suggests that the abuse is pervasive yet hard to pinpoint—it’s everywhere and yet invisible, making it difficult to understand fully or escape from.

2. “And shrinks the picture down to a tiny dot.” This line reflects how an abusive relationship can wear someone down to the point where they lose sight of themselves, their dreams, and their sense of self-worth. The “tiny dot” symbolizes a narrowed life where hope, autonomy, and self-esteem have been minimized.
3. “And from behind the screen, it can look so perfect / But it’s not.” Here, we see the facade of the relationship. The “screen” could represent how abusers often maintain a picture-perfect front, and the person may even deceive themselves, clinging to the illusion of a “perfect” relationship. But deep down, they know the truth—it’s not what it appears.
4. “So here I’m sitting in my car at the same old stop light. / I keep waiting for a change, but I don’t know what.” This is a poignant metaphor for indecision and feeling frozen in place. The “stop light” offers an opportunity for movement, but the person waits for something—maybe a sign, maybe courage—yet feels unsure and paralyzed. It reflects the inner struggle between wanting to leave and the fear of actually doing it.
5. “So red turns into green, turning into yellow. / But I’m just frozen here on the same old spot.” Despite having moments when they could leave (“red turns into green”), they’re “frozen” by doubt, fear of the unknown, and the emotional bonds that keep them tied to the abuser. The color changes symbolize the opportunities that come and go, but the person remains stuck, unable to break free.
6. “Well people are tricky, / You can’t afford to show, / Anything risky, anything they don’t know.” This line touches on the need to hide true emotions and vulnerabilities, common in abusive relationships. Opening up or being vulnerable feels dangerous, as the abuser might manipulate or use it against them, reinforcing the person’s sense of isolation.
7. “So baby kiss me like a drug, like a respirator. / And let me fall into the dream of the astronaut.” These lines reflect the emotional confusion and dependency within the relationship. The need to be “kissed like a drug” or “like a respirator” implies a longing for comfort or escape, but also a dependency on the abuser for a fleeting sense of peace or numbness. The “dream of the astronaut” suggests a desire to drift away, to be lost somewhere far from the pain and confusion.
8. “Where I get lost in space that goes on forever. / And you make all the rest just an afterthought.” The vast, endless space can symbolize the emotional void that feels comforting yet isolating. It reflects a wish to escape the painful reality and focus only on this idealized, isolated world with the abuser, while everything else (including one’s own needs) becomes secondary or forgotten.
9. “And I believe it’s you who could make it better. / But it’s not. No it’s not.” This ending reiterates the complex hold of the abusive relationship, where the person wishes for change, believing the abuser could “make it better” if only they wanted to. However, deep down, they recognize it won’t change—it’s a painful cycle that only leaves them more trapped.

Through these lyrics, Aimee Mann paints a vivid picture of the internal conflict of someone trapped in an abusive relationship. There’s a painful awareness that they should leave, yet they remain immobilized by fear, dependency, and the hope that things might somehow change. But it’s not.

this song is just so perfect. it reminds me of "save me" and why i love aimee mann.

heheh, honestly you guys, I take great pleasure in seeing very few posts on here. its like we have aimee mann at songmeanigns all to ourselves. maybe thats selfish but i like it. god i love the album lost in space. its kind of scary but also sooo beautiful. I absolutely love the line where she describes just refusing to put her foot on the pedal for no apparent reason. thats just awsome, its so weird and erratic and fucked up. i love it.

Ah, I adore this song, as well as all of Lost in Space--it's the only thing I've been listening to lately. "So baby kiss me like a drug, like a respirator" is my favorite line too...just so beautiful. Aimee Mann always seems to make me...tingly.

My fave song off the Lost In Space album(with Invisible Ink).I think she's trying to break away or get rid of her rubbish life but she's not able to do that.She's scared of changing,of trying to do anything new because people will not accept that.Well,at least this is what the song means to me.