Lyric discussion by howdidwegethere 

Cover art for Secret Door lyrics by Arctic Monkeys

This song is so beautifully written and makes me think of things like Narnia and The Secret Garden and other tales of beautiful and magical hidden places. This is one of my favorites of ALL of their songs. I've never taken this song to be about Alex and his girlfriend and the paparazzi but that does make complete sense.

This is how I see it: I've always thought of it as a shy guy admiring a confident girl. It seems at first that she just craves attention, but he realizes later that she doesn't crave it, she receives it and just doesn't let it bother her because she has a secret place that she escapes to....

Let's say the fools on parade are people in general. Everyone is trying to do the most to be recognized by anyone who will watch. He doesn't want to be watched, he'd rather watch everyone make a fool of themselves. She won't let the stares stop her from doing what she wants, though. She'll be a "fool" too.

He's not really living, he's in this dream world just watching everything happen. She kind of wakes him up and grabs his hand like, "hey, you wanna have fun or you wanna be this miserable guy judging everyone?"

Suddenly, they're in this place he couldn't even fathom (in love). He's astonished. She says nothing, just giggles, she's been here before. They go into their secret place and now he doesn't even care what the other fools are doing, he's completely occupied.

They're in this secret place--it's like they know everything around them is chaos, just fools on parade, but they've found their safe haven amidst it all--and he doesn't want to leave. But luckily, neither does she. And he realizes that she is smarter than he gave her credit for. She isn't a fool, after all. She's simply living by the words, "if you can't beat them, join them." But remember she's not really joining, just appearing to, because she has her secret door to escape behind, her secret passage behind the bookshelf. And that's how she can survive in that habitat. The other people are fools parading themselves in this crazy world, she's parading a different kind of crazy.

It's why she doesn't care what the others think as they watch her. They don't know what she knows, and what shy guy now knows, that there's more to life than trying to be noticed all the time or realizing that people just want to get noticed and being so turned off by it that you'd rather just sit there and watch them with the other spectators. The fools on parade are still fooling around trying to immortalize themselves through pictures and words "that holds her [absence]" but she doesn't care that she's missing the party. They conduct a sing-a-long....and clearly, she doesn't care.

Because they're behind the secret door of love!

My Interpretation

@howdidwegethere I like this interpretation, though you are too optimistic about the ending I think. the last two lines of the first verse "At least that's the conclusion; She came to in this overture" sort of announces that she is about to contradict herself.