Lyric discussion by Stolenbus 

Cover art for Chief Inspector Blancheflower lyrics by Fiery Furnaces, The

Ok, here's my interpretation for this song:

The title character, Chief Inspector Blancheflower, begins by recounting his joining the police force. When he was growing up, he had attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, so he couldn't ever focus, and he did poorly in school. He couldn't be the "typewriter mender" he had always wanted to be, and so he joined the police force. The line "Put my head down crumple my paper" refers to the frustration he felt when he could not focus on a specific idea, and thus he throws it out. It also seems he might be mildly retarded, because when he goes to look in the future-job index of his high school, the counselor has to "reinforce" him with raisins and stars and things of that nature.

Anyways, after Blancheflower's recount of the start of his career, the scene unfolds: On the 14th of May in Dumbarton, a crime scene has been discovered, and a farmer supposedly killed someone. The lady (Eleanor) has a discussion on how it happened. There are three versions, all with different weapons and victims. Eleanor starts to interview someone (perhaps the farmer?), and asks where the wife is.The man admits to killing he (he says, "Nowhere you'll see", meaning you'll never find the body). Then they lock him up in the storeroom (maybe in lack of an interrogation room/holding cell?). The line I'm confused about is, who Sir Robert Grayson is. Maybe he's some literary allusion, or just a figure of the town?

After the interviews (the first with a local "publican", or tavern-keeper, the second possibly with the "postcoach" driver, and the last possibly with Sir Robert Grayson, whoever he is), Eleanor gets a confession from a man who's killed his brother Michael because he started a relationship with his ex-girlfriend, Jenny. Jenny might possibly have been killed as well, and I believe this "deposition" (testimony) is a confession to the original crime scene. All this is set in, I believe, rural Illinois, not too far from Springfield.

The last line of the song goes back to someone, but I can't figure out who. My guess is it is Chief Inspector Blancheflower, as a conclusion to his role in the investigation. It never mentioned that Blancheflower was married, however.

Anyways, that's my interpretation. IT really helped to map it all out like this. This is a GREAT song, my favorite off of Blueberry Boat. I love Matthew's stories, even if they're hard to figure out.

This sounds pretty accurate.

Except, Blancheflower isn't mildly retarded. I remember dealing with ADD in Middle School. I was sent to the "Special Ed" Classroom where they did nothing to help me, and instead treated me like I had some form of Autism.

Not too good for your self-esteem when you're stuck doing worksheets about the world's first roller-coaster designed for retarded children.

Not Valid

@Stolenbus

The last line refers to the "fratricider" just before he meets the inspector. He drives up to his "buddy's old bar," the same place he and the inspector are sharing that cider. (I'm starting to think that Jenny is this guy's mistress.)

My guess is that—since the inspector says the killer told her "this and more"—the opening of the song is from the perspective of the killer.

But then again, these kind of literal interpretations are kind of pointless.