Rusholme Ruffians

Victoria Wood's "Fourteen Again" seems to have been a major inspiration for this song:

I want to be fourteen again, When sex was just called number ten,

  And I was up to seven and a half.

Boys were for love, girls were for fun. You burst out laughing if you saw a nun.

  Sophistication was a sports car and a chiffon scarf.

I want to be fourteen again, Tattoo my self with a fountain pen,

  Pretend to like the taste of rum and Coke,

Chuck my school hat in a bush, Spit on my mascara brush,

  Buy Consulate and teach myself to smoke.

I want to be fourteen again, Free rides on the waltzer off the fairground men

  For a promise of a snog the last night of the fair—

French kissing as the kiosks shut Behind the generators with your coconut,

  The coloured lights reflected in the Brylcream on his hair.

I want to be fourteen again, For all the things I didn't know then.

  When I was funny, I was famous, I was never ignored,

I was a crazy girl, I had to laugh. I had Ilya Kuriakin's autograph.

  I had no idea you could wake up feeling bored.