Polyamorous

I'm polyamorous. Let me explain what this means. I don't beleive love should be confined to just one relationship at a time. This does not have anything to do with sex. Poly-multiple or many. Amour- love(s) This means I am free to love anyone I want-as long as it is approved and accepted by any current loves I might have. This can mean emotional, mental, or physical love. This requires a lot of maturity and openness to pull off. A lot of honesty and negotiation, as well as respect for the people you love. Google it if you don't wish to be ignorant, or if you think maybe you might already be poly. I thought I wasn't-but then I read about it and found it to be more agreeable than demanding my lovers to only care about me. Now if they wanted to-they can flirt or do whatever I tell them I'm ok with, with out being closed off to what ever love might come into their life- just as long as they check in with me first. This way there is no jealousy, not deceit, no lies, and a whole lot of happy people. I'm currently not dating anyone, but I'm still poly. Its a way of being not an excuse to have sex with anyone you choose. See I am seeing this girl, she's poly, and dating a really great guy. So she follows the rules they have, and we don't go any further unless we're all ok about it. But this does make me just a friend. I still love her, its all just too new to rush into things just yet.

this is what this song means to me:

Let go... Letting go of jealousy and secrets is very important. He sceams it so maybe he's trying to force letting go?

The day has come to an end, the sun is over my head. My polyamorous friend, you got me in a mess of trouble again. So...

he stayed up all night with his "friend", it is now day. maybe they had sex? but she has a b/f. normally you would be really nervous or guilty here if you are not poly.

Just when you think that you're all right I'm calling out from the inside. I never hurt anyone, I never listen at all.

he's confused, he thought he would be ok getting into this new relationship, but there is that other guy/girl now. justify your actions by remembering you didn't hurt anyone-but he's not sure. He's confused b/c this is so weird for him-and he didn't listen/learn enough to understand how this works, uncertainty.

They've come to get me again. The cloud is over my head. my ployamorus friend, he got me in a mess of trouble again So...

They all hang out together now b/c that is how this is done. this would be like a V, two people loving the same "hinge" person. his head clouds up(sadness, confusion) when -they- come to pick him and he now has to hang out with the other. how would you feel? would you even know what to say? its awkward.

Just stay away from the white light, I'd say your worst side's your best side

Now its harder. white light usually a symbol of good;he feels what he is doing here is wrong, but he likes her, so should he stay away from what he was raised to think is good, or should he burn like a moth? now he has to be honest and open with both, he's not sure what side he should show-lie to make the other like him so he isn't told to never see her again, or open up and fall into something he's unsure about? He might think what he's doing is bad, so then the worst side would be better here, right?

Well, how do you know(x4)

He's confused, he doesn't know what to do. and he can't justify leaving her b/c he loves her, or leaving behind his morals and beliefs for her. He's conflicted. he's not sure he hasn't hurt anyone(him her or her lover) did he understand this new way of loving or is he being used? he doesn't know how to tell. he thought he was ok with it, but now its gotten very complicated, b/c of this "friend".

Let(s?) go... Might mean both. run? or let go of his ideals and morals. both suck in one way, but are good in another.
Its a tormented song about a confused guy who is dealing with this "friend" who is polyamorous, and he blames them for complicating things. But he's the one who can't let go and be ok with what is happening. Trust me it is one of the most difficult things to deal with when you are new to poly.

What would you do here? Stay a friend, and get wrapped up in this type of crazy and complicated lifestyle? If you love them, you want to. But if you are not poly, its going to be hard for you to deal with them being with someone else. If you can't figure it out really quick- someone will get hurt and it will be you. Unless you become poly, that is. Its a lot to loose/add to your life.

Hope this helps. Makes sense to me, at least. This song feels just how I felt when this happend to me. I was a mess. Just so you know, I still love her, and we're still "friends". I've just learnt to listen and let go all of the things that made me jealous.

P.S. no band thinks it a good idea to openly admit that they are a deviant. People don't take kindly to my type anywhere. It would be like suicide-just look at what all of you thought poly was in the previous posts-no one understands you at first. He'd be labeled and filed away as a pervert.

Normally I would not bother commenting, though it appears as though some clarification is needed.

Polyamory is a neologism which denotes the concept of "multiple loves". It is a hybrid word: 'poly' is Greek for 'many' and 'amor' is Latin for 'love'.

Though, if you are actually interested in what being "poly" entails, and removing the truths from the myths, I recommend the Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality, Volume 6, Feb. 27, 2003.

ejhs.org/volume6/polyamory.htm

The biggest misconception I am seeing here within the comments of this thread is that you keep interchanging "sex" and "love" which though can exist together, are very much different creatures.

As for what the video is about, it would look as though the first female would be his girlfriend, the one he is more than likely in a monogamous relationship with. The second female (and consequently the third), would be his friend, enjoying her open poly relationship, which he appears to be enticed by, and getting dragged into.

For those who have made the conversion from monogamy to poly, you may be all too familiar with this situation. Just my 2 cents.

• Kyu - facebook.com/group.php

From what I understand.... The song is about him "thinking with the wrong head", so to speak. He's saying that he knows better than to chase every chick he sees, but his "polyamorous friend" (aka his dick) causes him to do it anyways. I think.

I know how I remember this song is nothing close to its actual interpretation, but this is what always plays in my mind. About two years ago a friend of mine got pregnant by this guy she was friends w/benefits with, and showed up at my house at 2 in the morning bawling her eyes. Trouble is, she actually had deeper feelings for him...and she wasn't the only girl he was playing. "The cloud is over my head. My polyamorous friend, He got me in a mess of trouble again"

My friend didn't have the heart to go through with an abortion, and I didn't want to force her either. But when I asked her why she hadn't been a little more careful, she said she thought 'nothing would happen' (I facepalmed a little inside at that). "Just when you think that you're all right I'm calling out from the inside. I never heard anyone, I never listen at all."

Then when she told him, he told her to fuck off...and not to bother trying to have anything to do with him ever again. "Just stay away from the white light, I'd say your worst side's your best side..."

Now my friend has an adorable 1 and a half year old son, and suprise suprise, she hasn't heard from that idiot since. Last I heard, he's still playing. So, this song does kind of have a negative connection for me, but at the same time it reminds me of something absolutely wonderful that happened as a result- i.e., my friend's son <3 :)

Wow. I just heard this song last week. My bf played it after we argued about his side chick who he's denying after he already claimed her in our faces under the cover of 'I'm just playing' which is his way of confessing his infidelities and slapping them in my face. Although it was 8 years ago, gloworange's explanation is spot on. I wish more men and women would just chose to be poly and admit it openly and honestly. Then there will be a lot less cheating, lying, and heartbreaking going on to say the least. My bf has no idea how much pain he causes me or how much damage he does to our relationship when he constantly attacks me and plays victim with my suspicion of him cheating. I only confronted him once. Ever. Now he torments me 2-3 times per week with the same mess after I said hey we've discussed this already. You have your story. I have mine. Move on from it. He's holding us back. And then he wonders why I'm not quick to marry him. Boo.

Well was looking around to try and find out what Polyamorous means...so heres the scoop. (Found a link on Google...woohoo)

xeromag.com/fvpoly.html

Basically I guess hes saying something went wrong with his "polyamorous" relationship that he was having with 2 people. If you've seen the video it makes more sense (Download it at antipopvideos.com)

Great song anyway, kick ass all around

This song is great. Clever too. What more could you want?

this is like one of the best Breaking Benjamin songs ever made i love it ^_^

you're all wrong. Ben Burnley of breaking benjamin is bi-sexual. Polyamorous means to like 2 or to be intimate with more than one partner at a time, while everyone involved knows. This was his "coming out" song. It was a tough song for him to write because it's not a socially acceptable status to have, his label was telling him to keep it a secret "stay away from the white light". It's better to keep it a secret but he's proud of it. "They say you're wort sides your best side". The label again is saying keep it a secret "I never heard anyone, I never listen at all".

I think this is about a man who has a multiple personality.

The day has come to an end, the sun is over my head. My polyamorous friend, Got me in a mess of trouble again. So...

The days is done and his life is going good (Sun over my head). However the Polyamorous "friend" (his multiple personality) has caused him into a mess of trouble.

Just when you think that you're all right I'm calling out from the inside. I never heard anyone, I never listen at all.

I find this to be from the other personality. Saying to not think he will be Alright and that the side is "calling" him out from the inside (Known as his mind taking on the personality). The side never heard anyone and never listened to his other "side" and his friends and family to stop.

They've come to get me again. The cloud is over my head. my ployamorus friend, got me in a mess of trouble again So...

The friends and family are getting to him and his life is ruined (They've come to get me again,The cloud is over my head.) The "friend" gets him into more trouble.

Just stay away from the white light, I'll tell ya what side's your best side. I never heard anyone, I never listen at all.

The White light could be the way he gets his other Polyamorous side off. The Polyamorous side is saying he will tell the guy(guy who has two personalties) which side is his best side. The side also never heard or listen to anyone or friends and family.

Well, how do you know(x4)

The polyamorous side is wondering how the friends and family even know.

Let's go

The polyamorous is telling the normal side to go into the polyamorous side