There was jello in the fingerprints detective dulllight discovered.
It proved to be the most important finding in the case
And where as detectives slocks and slovits
Slobbered over smutty photographs
Dulllight had a better lead to follow.
He followed the ringing to the telephone where a voice asked
"excuse me aren't you so and so?"
"oh so and so since you left I have been eating only sweets cause they remind me of you."

He felt this surely was a clue.
So he climbed into the tub wearing his underwear and overcoat,
Jumped aboard the model boat and followed the water down the drain.
In his brain there are file cabinets
And secretaries filing their nails downstairs
(but I don't want to talk about that room downstairs).
At this moment detective slocks and slovets
Realize that since they had reported on the crime scene
This morning each of them has aged over fifty years.
Two butterflies land on their shoulders and harmonize softly in their ears
"where did all the time go?"
"did you think that you'd stay young forever?"
"but at least you're still together"
The two detectives held hands in the moonlight.
The butterflies flew away which prompted slovit's to say,"l miss them already".
Slocks removed a fountain pen from his breast pocket,
Drove it deep into slovit's throat and began screeching
"death to the parchment whale, the robot I am lasaile".
While in prison, slocks wrote one of the most revered exercises in free verse titled
"the cause of gauze". "oh the cause of gauze,
The manuels have fondled many memories from my lap though
Each memory has its own lap and swimmers swim laps.
Even swimmers have laps however and while in that
Condition many require a delicate gauze.
I desire only this in my decrepitude,
That I will have one more opportunity
To serve as a gauze to my fellow man
And that in that state of gauze can somehow disturb
The world less often with my prickly fingers."
When detective dulllight returning from the catacombs
First heard the news of the slocks and slovets
Stabbing and subsequent poetry enterprise
He immediately fell to the floor and began plucking peaches from his cheeks.
This eventually became a tiresome activity
So he evaporated into the cream a float a child's bedtime coco.


Lyrics submitted by gleebs

The Events Leading Up to the Collapse of Detective Dulllight Lyrics as written by Kevin Barnes

Lyrics © BUG MUSIC OBO APOLLINAIRE RAVE

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The Events Leading Up to the Collapse of Detective Dulllight song meanings
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10 Comments

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  • 0
    General Comment

    very cool and ultra psychedelic. i especially dig all the vocal effects. question. does anyone know if any of the other members of the band put their own vocals on this song? If not, then Kevin is a fantastic impressionist.

    pumkinhedon October 17, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    this song always makes me happy for some reason

    rockthemsockson December 30, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    this song always makes me happy for some reason

    rockthemsockson December 30, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    I wouldn't refer to it as a "song."

    btm7788on June 22, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    This "song" is incredible! Possibly an acid trip, but whatever... I was so amazed by this, I wrote a screen play for it, and am hoping to some day film it...

    BRICKismyHERO64on March 03, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    Man, I've had some of the best nights of my life getting AT&T internet relay operators to call people and recite "The Cauze of Gauze" to them.

    souljamikeon March 20, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    I. Love. This. Track.

    When I first heard it, I couldn't stop listening to it. It's amazing. Especially The Cause of Gauze.

    thepoptimiston March 30, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    Genius!!

    wobo woboon August 24, 2008   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    that's really weird... it's cool tho. I'm not sure if I like it or not, but it's very interesting

    Seezleon January 07, 2010   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    Does anyone know if they've ever told this story at a show?

    Kingofthebeachon June 13, 2011   Link

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