If your lady is cranky she either needs to be fucked, or have a soulful conversation with you, possibly both
Decide carefully and be cautious in your approach

Gay ja vu - when you feel you experienced the same gay day as yesterday

Old people make me crave Cracker Barrel

I believe Tony Hawk could only get so much air because growing up his last name had him convinced he was a bird

What if everything in our ocean swam around in outer space

What if hardcore vegetarian animal activists were realists aware of the circle of life
And each day actually saw the microscopic creatures their feet crushed due to being out of sight

What you see is not things as they are, not completely
It's as you see them
You ever watched a slowed down nature documentary

Poison Help stickers don't help if you live alone and are too poisoned to read them

Imagine if every President, King, and Leader sat down together and smoked from a bong
Even if it's K2
That will do

What if one night all the walls in your apartment complex were removed
And you found yourself living in a house with your neighbors under the moon

What if God is real
What if God is not real

I don't learn too much in ocean documentaries
I just get lost in the water

The Mandela Effect is a euphemism for being wrong

School pride is the same thing as gay pride

Bottled beer might taste better, but canned beer allows your full trash bags to feel lighter

All that food destroys butt holes

That was so gay, I am going to throw up my Cheerios from tomorrow morning

How much alcohol does an alcoholic drink?

Slip a trip

All I need is this kid on the street, a margarita and a beat, says the pedophile with the happy feet

I have to shut the bathroom door just this one time, 'cause I'm naked and I'm talkin' to my daddy

I came from my dad's nuts
He came from his nuts too

I have a six pack on each butt cheek

The only thing better than killing bugs is killing people who hate you killing bugs

The smartest thing I know is that I'm a dumb ass

There's a risk if you read a book on evolution
If you die before you're finished reading you might die as a fish

Japan's flag looks like a maxi pad that's been used in a politically correct way

You can't listen to only the left brain
It's not right for a reason

Breathing is so awesome, it's one thing I might just do until the day I die

Lyrics submitted by goldengoatee

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