Tummy

From the second dinner date to the first long kiss
To the house key, the imprints in her strong fist.
To the slow dance steps that she taught me in the hallway
Whisper, snuggle, lay in bed all day

I keep a heart breaker pistol in my sheets
Covering the carving of the initials on the tree trunk
The type of pressure buried seeds break under
Choke-hold, the limbs until the leaves change color

From the blood loss, to the love tossed
Like a wooden stick to a young puppy scrapping with its litter mates
Scratch until he rips the drapes
as he's teething on the wood that was bracketing the picket gates

But this was our house, and we were young lovers
My nerves separate to numb clusters
And look like lily pad patches in my bloodstream
And made the love fade, shattering the sunbeam


But there was one thing certain
Together We brushed our teeth and closed all the bedroom curtains
And I held her in the sheets, we didn't talk about life
We felt it was complete, protected by a shell and didn't speak
I'm guessing my intelligence had peaked because I could not outsmart science

From her trembling "You're going to be a daddy" smile
To my haunted thoughts of raising up a latchkey child
I had to walk nine more months in her shoes
'Cause these are not those dreams I can abuse

Soaked, when my baby isn't brave
From the tummy to the bottle from the cradle to the grave

And I watched her frolic over black asphalt
Simple pleasures, jubilant confusion
Guarded by the curtains of adult hands
Who disinfect wounds with amniotic fluids

And there's an instinct of fear you know
It's my job to make sure my daughter is protected
Too many masterpieces weren't painted
Too many painters put their signatures upon sketches

And I chalk them over damp, black asphalt
Simple pleasures, jubilant confusion
Drawn by the fingers of adult hands
Who disinfect wounds with amniotic fluids

And there's an instinct to fail you know
It's my job to make sure my sh-[Inaudible] is protected
[inaudible words]

And I remember pressing my ears against your pregnant belly
So I can hear what our baby seal had to tell me
The fragrance of pheromones, the seasons were sober
I massage my thumbs upon your overworked shoulders

Cooking you cheese-eggs and lukewarm pudding
Thinking of names, shopping for newborn footies
Teagan full of fire with a tummy full of water
We're going to have a daughter, I'm going to be a father

My hands are blistered, working two J-O-Bs
Waiting for my baby corporate servitude is lonely
November 11th, of '03
I smelled the amniotic fluid bubble when I heard the news they told me

Telephone urgent, Teagan's mother was calling
She told me you were lying in a puddle of offspring and weak
'Cause everything that was so sweet was miscarried on the bloodsoaked sheets

So from the knuckles that I broke on the concrete walls
To the tears in the hospital bathroom stalls
From the vast amount of blood you lost in seven days
To the daughter I could listen to talk but never raised

I pour the 40 ounce of amniotic fluid to the concrete
I wish to be an author in its prime
I co-wrote a failed motion picture with you
The plot twist god turns water into wine

Rock a bye baby, are you fertile, are you brave?
When the water breaks the cradle turns into a grave
And even if it falls, there ain't no pad
That could soak up the gestation period

It goes

Rock a bye baby, are you fertile, are you brave?
When the water breaks the cradle turns into a grave
And ain't nobody sober
'Cause god turns water into wine before the gestation period is over

Walk nine more months in her shoes
Because these are not those dreams I can abuse
And he performed it himself, he performed it himself God dammit

Walk nine more months in her shoes
Because these are not those dreams I can abuse