"Esmerelda" as written by and Benjamin John Howard....
Oh Blinding, now I see
I could not hold you
My orange tree lived in the darkened room
From three words to share

Maybe you were free before
My blackened wing covered you
I took the sing from your song
I made a bed where you don't belong

Call me she fell beneath the
Wheels to help me up
Black sea, I failed to be a light
You found alone

Call me hold me she fell
Beneath the wheels to help me up
Black Sea, the monster
Killed the melody of love

And now I'm going places on my own

Blinded, now I see the death
Moves amongst us and
With such ease surround us
These silent beasts so hard to bare

Lonely, oh no not me
I have a grave to dig fast
Moving feet you gave me
Light where it once was gone
I made a bed, where we don't belong

Call me she fell beneath the
Wheels to help me up
Black sea, I failed to be a light
You found alone

Call me hold me she fell
Beneath the wheels to help me up
Black Sea, the monster
Killed the melody of love

And now I'm going places on my own


Lyrics submitted by KiraKira, edited by hubajubba, xxBrokenSmilexx

"Esmerelda" as written by Benjamin John Howard

Lyrics © Warner/Chappell Music, Inc.

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Esmerelda song meanings
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6 Comments

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  • +2
    My Interpretation[Oh Blinded, now I see
    I could not hold you
    My orange tree left in the darkened room
    From three of us to share]

    Looking in retrospect, he knows he didn't have the capacity to love and hold her. Perhaps this is due to him struggling with his own demons, which is reinforced in the next lines - he refers to her as his orange tree, a symbolism of giving - for the three of them to share. The third 'person' could be whatever he is struggling with, which feels like a presence that never leaves them alone. My guess would be depression.

    [Maybe you were free before
    My blackened wing covered you
    I took the sing from your song
    I made a bed where you don't belong]

    He feels like he trapped her in this negative/toxic environment with their relationship. She is affected by him, and becomes worse off than if she hadn't met him.

    [Poor me, she fell beneath the
    Wheels to help me up
    Black sea, I failed to be a light
    You found alone]

    "Poor me" sounds sarcastic, he realizes now that back then he never saw her pain, only knew his own demons. She sacrificed parts of herself to help him. He realizes that he never gave her anything back.

    ....stuff along the same lines....

    (She dies, either literally or her spirit dies figuratively)

    [And now I'm going places on my own]

    Maybe her 'death' was a wake-up call for him, he carries on in life. This line states he is alone, but might also hint that he feels she should have been with him 'going places' in life, except she no longer can because she sacrificed her own path for him to go on.
    inia0on June 07, 2016   Link
  • +1
    General CommentYou've got the lyrics wrong. It is..

    Oh blinded
    Now I see that I
    Could not hold you
    My orange tree
    left in this darkened room
    for three of us to share

    Oh Maybe you were free
    Before my
    Blackened wing covered you
    I took the sing from your song
    I made a bed where you don't belong

    Oh poor me
    she fell beneath the wheels
    to help me up
    Black sea
    I failed to be the light you found and loved
    Oh poor me
    she fell beneath the wheels
    To help me up
    black sea
    the monster killed the melody you loved

    Now I'm going places on my own

    Blinded, now I see that death
    moves amongst us
    And with such ease
    Arrived to surround us
    These silent beast
    are hard to bear

    Lonely
    oh no not me
    I have a grave to dig
    fast moving feet

    You gave me light
    Where it once was gone
    I made a bed where you don't belong



    lafayon August 24, 2013   Link
  • 0
    General Comment"before my blackened wing covered you" probably makes more sense
    girlfrombarcelonaon March 16, 2013   Link
  • 0
    General CommentOkay *cracks knuckles* let's get this done:
    'Oh Blinding, now I see
    I could not hold you
    My orange tree lived in the darkened room
    From three words to share'
    I think this verse is about how much he is in love with this person, where he is blinded by love and his orange tree, his open-mindedness, was in a dark room where it could not grow

    'Maybe you were free before
    My blackened wing covered you
    I took the sing from your song
    I made a bed where you don't belong'
    This talks about how he took everything from her, either figuratively or literally, and
    made said person depressed

    'Oh poor me
    she fell beneath the wheels
    to help me up
    Black sea
    I failed to be the light you found and loved
    Oh poor me
    she fell beneath the wheels
    To help me up
    black sea
    the monster killed the melody you loved'

    This part he really messed up. This girl does so much for her, even makes sacrifices for him, and figuratively 'kills' everything she loved.

    'Now I'm going places on my own

    Blinded, now I see that death
    moves amongst us
    And with such ease
    Arrived to surround us
    These silent beast
    are hard to bear'

    First part: obvious. They broke up.
    Next part is kind of hard:
    I think then they both realize that the relationship is not going to work out, and even some violent stuff happens

    'Lonely
    oh no not me
    I have a grave to dig
    fast moving feet'

    This verse is even harder. Maybe he doesn't want to be alone, and the grave to dig is where he marries someone and 'dies' in the field of dating.

    'You gave me light
    Where it once was gone
    I made a bed where you don't belong'

    This just sums it up. The girl gave her so much, and he just made her regret making those sacrifices. Beautiful song.
    zeebijackalon March 04, 2014   Link
  • 0
    My InterpretationThis song is beautifully sad. I agree on the most part with zeebijackal, however I think the song is about a literal death of the one he loved and how he feels guilty about it.
    "oh blinding, now I see"
    This juxtaposition could be about how he didn't realise at the time, but now sees that he was stifling her, and he was not enough for her. Didn't deserve her.
    "my blackened wing covered you/ I took the sing from your song"
    Again about him stifling her, making her his and effectively ruining her individuality and stopping her from living.
    "I made a bed where you don't belong"
    This is the important part to me. It could be to do with the grave she now lies in. He drove her to depression, her death became inevitable because of him.
    "Call me she fell beneath the
    Wheels to help me up
    Black sea, I failed to be a light
    You found alone "
    She stayed with him to see if she could make him a better person but it didn't work. He failed her.
    "Black Sea, the monster/Killed the melody of love"
    He is the monster, drowning her in darkness (depression).
    "Moves amongst us and
    With such ease surround us
    These silent beasts so hard to bare"
    It should have been him that ended this way, but it ended up being her, she couldn't deal with all the sufferings he forced upon her.
    "Lonely, oh no not me
    I have a grave to dig fast
    Moving feet you gave me
    Light where it once was gone
    I made a bed, where we don't belong"
    He's gone abit mad with grief. She was his everything, but he only sees that now.
    The change from "you don't belong" to "we" I think means that he plans on joining her in death.
    "And now I'm going places on my own"
    This line is tricky, but I think it means he's no longer got her with him, alone he will end up back in the darkness he had before he met her, which is why hes planned to end it all.
    Emilia_kateon September 28, 2014   Link
  • 0
    Song ComparisonIt's interesting that the song is called Esmerelda or Esmeralda. It could be in honor of a girl he once knew, but not many Girls are named Esmerelda that I know of.

    It makes me wonder if he's maybe not drawing Inspiration from the Esmerelda of Victor Hugo's novel The Hunchback of Notre Dame:

    The story of the relationship between both Lovers in the song is not at all like the story of Esmeralda and Quasimodo, but a certain Leitmotiv can be drawn as a comparison:

    Esmeralda died executed and Quasimodo found her in a communal pit and stayed by her side until he himself died next to her corpse.

    "black sea, the Monster killed the melody you loved" the book continuously makes questions about who the true Monster is because Quasimodo clearly is seen as such in every context and yet characters that are seen as righteous like Frollo and Febo prove to be the real Monsters of the story.

    The last Strophe is where I can make the biggest comparison:

    Blinded, now I see that death
    moves amongst us
    And with such ease
    Arrived to surround us
    These silent beats
    are hard to bear

    He knows death is coming for him, it's surrounding him. He welcomes it, as the silent beats of his heart are hard to hear, which means he doesn't want his heart to Keep on beating.

    This is Quasimodo finding Esmeralda in a communal pit and staying by the side of her corpse, because he wants to die by her. Further exemplified in the next verse:

    Lonely
    oh no not me
    I have a grave to dig
    fast moving feet

    He won't be lonely, he will be busy digging his own grave and hers. Dying by her side.

    You gave me light
    Where it once was gone
    I made a bed where you don't belong


    Esmeralda was the only woman who ever showed Quasimodo mercy. He kidnapped her twice, once because Frollo forced him to, the second to save her. She gave him hope, but he couldn't stop her death. He expected she would be safe with him in the church of Notre Dame, but she didn't belong there. Neither of them did.

    It's just a thought, but it's interesting.
    blacktideon January 12, 2016   Link

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