This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
You will cough up crows that peck my eyes
And I will do nothing but go blind
But my heart
It has eyes
And my love
It has sight
Even though it may be
A little cloudy
And you will break my back for all the burdens I lay upon it
But I will never blame you for those bees inside this bonnet
And my lungs will grow cancers
And my back it will grow achy
I will buy us an acre
Of some land in the city
We could live there together
Or I'll live alone less happy
But I'll live
Unfortunately
And I will do nothing but go blind
But my heart
It has eyes
And my love
It has sight
Even though it may be
A little cloudy
And you will break my back for all the burdens I lay upon it
But I will never blame you for those bees inside this bonnet
And my lungs will grow cancers
And my back it will grow achy
I will buy us an acre
Of some land in the city
We could live there together
Or I'll live alone less happy
But I'll live
Unfortunately
Lyrics submitted by WorldStrike, edited by mudswipe, Amanda87
Add your thoughts
Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.
Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!
More Featured Meanings
The Night We Met
Lord Huron
Lord Huron
Mountain Song
Jane's Addiction
Jane's Addiction
Jane's Addiction vocalist Perry Farrell gives Adam Reader some heartfelt insight into Jane’s Addiction's hard rock manifesto "Mountain Song", which was the second single from their revolutionary album Nothing's Shocking. Mountain song was first recorded in 1986 and appeared on the soundtrack to the film Dudes starring Jon Cryer. The version on Nothing's Shocking was re-recorded in 1988.
"'Mountain Song' was actually about... I hate to say it but... drugs. Climbing this mountain and getting as high as you can, and then coming down that mountain," reveals Farrell. "What it feels to descend from the mountain top... not easy at all. The ascension is tough but exhilarating. Getting down is... it's a real bummer. Drugs is not for everybody obviously. For me, I wanted to experience the heights, and the lows come along with it."
"There's a part - 'Cash in now honey, cash in Miss Smith.' Miss Smith is my Mother; our last name was Smith. Cashing in when she cashed in her life. So... she decided that, to her... at that time, she was desperate. Life wasn't worth it for her, that was her opinion. Some people think, never take your life, and some people find that their life isn't worth living. She was in love with my Dad, and my Dad was not faithful to her, and it broke her heart. She was very desperate and she did something that I know she regrets."
Gentle Hour
Yo La Tengo
Yo La Tengo
This song was originally written by a guy called Peter Gutteridge. He was one of the founders of the "Dunedin Sound" a musical scene in the south of New Zealand in the early 80s. From there it was covered by "The Clean" one of the early bands of that scene (he had originally been a member of in it's early days, writing a couple of their best early songs). The Dunedin sound, and the Clean became popular on american college radio in the mid to late 80s. I guess Yo La Tengo heard that version.
Great version of a great song,
Head > Heels
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
“Head > Heels” is a track that aims to capture what it feels like to experience romance that exceeds expectations. Ed Sheeran dedicates his album outro to a lover who has blessed him with a unique experience that he seeks to describe through the song’s nuanced lyrics.
American Town
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran shares a short story of reconnecting with an old flame on “American Town.” The track is about a holiday Ed Sheeran spends with his countrywoman who resides in America. The two are back together after a long period apart, and get around to enjoying a bunch of fun activities while rekindling the flames of their romance.
I thought this was a more obvious one, but apparently not..maybe I'm the one that's wrong but I figured this is loosely about mental illness, but not entirely. It's about being a broken, damaged person with lots of baggage and problems. Relationships are hard in that situation because you don't want your issues and struggles to bring down the person you love most in the same way they haunt you. I think it's more about seeing oneself as being like a disease to the ones they love, always a burden, nothing but sadness, anger, and self-loathing
. ....feeling like you understand why someone wouldn't want to spend their life with you, not blaming them in anyway because you don't even want to be with you...yet holding out hope that maybe this is the person that genuinely thinks you're worth the trouble and decides to be with you in anyway....while remaining guarded enough to not be disappointed if and when they change their mind.
I mean, I feel like I could copy and paste this same exact thing for a handful of other AJJ songs and it would be accurate...admitting to inadequacy, super classic AJJ theme if you think about it. Sean writes from his soul, most all of it is autobiographical and he rarely uses complex metaphors...he lays it right out for you to make sure it's very clear where he stands. It isn't a bad thing, I'm just saying he's usually fairly direct about his message, he doesn't want you to be thinking about what his lyrics mean, he wants you to focus on what they mean for you. Short story made very long, but procrastination knows no limits, I guess.