Teenage Spaceship

Perhaps it is a reach, but I believe this song is about a teenage death, maybe even a suicide, or contemplation of death by a teenager, due to teen depression and isolation. Think it is a reach ? Let’s analyze.

First of all, the slow, droning guitar suggests an air of desolation and sadness. Therefore, it is definitely not about anything positive in being a teenager.

Now, to analyze the lyrics, line by line:

“Flying around the houses at night. Flying alone.”

This is an extraordinarily powerful image. It conjures images of the houses of a neighborhood at night, with the yards and streets very quiet in the darkness. Yet some houses may have lights shining through their windows, with people and activity inside. Still, outside in the night it is quiet and still. The teenager, whether only imagining in his mind, or maybe even walking the quiet streets and seeing the houses where other people are together, is contemplating these houses from the outside, envisioning groups of friends, even parties or social activities of which he is not a part of. The teen is “flying alone”, excluded, maybe even ostracized, and definitely experiencing the loneliness of a sad teenager.

“A teenage spaceship. I was a teenage spaceship. Landing at night.”

The image of the spaceship conjures the image of being, not only alone, but being of a great distance from others, and furthermore, in a shell within himself. The “landing at night” imagery may suggest that at night, his day, and life itself for him, ends, while the social life of others continues.

“I was beautiful with all my lights”

Is this a positive image ? The teenager in loneliness sees the good in himself, but if only others could see it. The teen assesses that if only others would give him a chance, he would have positive aspects to offer, maybe loyalty and friendship, kindness and compassion. Again, if only others could see it. If only he wasn’t alone in his shell and so distant from others.

“Loomed so large on the horizon”

The imagery of being “on the horizon” has long been an image of death or passing from this world, in literature and film. Once the teenager had died, then people noticed him. Or, perhaps the teenager is merely musing upon the idea that if he died, then people would notice him.

“So large, people thought my windows were stars”

As often occurs, if a person, such as a teenager, meets an untimely death, that person is not only noticed, but the attention that is given is often overly positive, even to the level of saintly praise. “He really was such a good person” and “He will be missed by everyone” are often the superlatives that are offered. Maybe in this case, the teenager hasn’t actually died, but is contemplating how people would think of him if he did.

“So large on the horizon. People thought my windows were stars. A teenage spaceship. A teenage spaceship”

Repeating the sentiment for emphasis.

“And I swore I'd never lay like a log, bark like a dog”

Often when someone says “I swore I would never…” is an indication that the person did. In this case is it the imagery of, say, being humiliated, maybe ostracized, ridiculed, or maybe he even humiliated himself in the process of trying to gain acceptance or make friends.

“I was a teenage smog. Sewn to the sky”

He is now a teenage ghost or spirit, and also a faint and distant and forgotten memory to others. The image of being sown to the sky is that he has departed from Earth, now forever a resident of the heavens. Yet another image of death, or maybe as a teenager, he wished it was so.

In short, the imagery of this song is of a teenager (like so many) who are on the outside, looking in. Furthermore, that separation is great, and the teenager is encased in a shell of loneliness, shyness and fear. While the teenager sees the beauty in himself, he feels that others do not, unless of course, through death, or some passing, people would see that beauty in him, whether he has actually died, or is only contemplating the idea in his mind. Still, his distance from others has left him with feelings of humiliation and even a level of regret. This is a sad, yet hypnotically beautiful song, nonetheless.