In my happy home I barely breathe
In my lovers arms I find relief
And there's a sky that's changing and a bird that sings
I never once in my wayward life was heading to run out

In my lovers arms I wait for morning
I beg my god to speak and tear me apart
I'd lay down my body I'd lay down my arms
I never once in my sweet short life meant anybody harm

In my happy home i read the signs
In my lovers arms I move in time
There's no more crying and there's no more lies
I never once in my sweet short life was waiting for desire

And there's no more crying
And there's no more pain
I never thought for one second I'd have nothing left but shame

In my happy home I barely breathe
I never once in my wayward life was heading to run out




Lyrics submitted by glaistig

Happy Home Lyrics as written by John Kastner

Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd., Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group

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Happy Home song meanings
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  • +5
    General Comment

    I don't think this song has much to do with suicide at all. This song is about infidelity. "Happy home" seems to be an ironic term for her home life which seems to be anything but. It seems implied that they have been together for a long time, but the magic is gone and the dynamics of the relationship have changed. She can "barely breathe" there. Her "lover" is the one she is cheating on her husband (they'd don't have to be married, I am arbitrarily assigning this word because it makes discussion a little simpler). In the first verse it's just before morning and she's cheated on her husband by spending the night with her lover (she "was never headed to run out" [on her husband]). She's happy here unlike in her happy home. Second verse, she's still in her lover's bed but she's thinking about the consequences of what she's done. She is wanting god to smite her and punish her for her actions. She "never meant anybody harm" The third verse seems her imagining what the future would be like with her lover. There is happiness in her life ("there's no more crying [or] lies"), unlike the present where it's as if she'd completely forgotten that she could feel this way. It's not as if she was searching for someone to cheat on her husband with. She was not "waiting for desire." She had always imagined that she would always be faithful, and suddenly she has found herself with this second man with whom she's completely smitten. In the end she knows her life will be much happier if she leaves her husband for her lover, ("no more crying" "no more pain"), but she will have to live with the shame of what she's done to her husband who still loves her. I think in the last two lines, she decides to return to her husband and abandon a potentially happier life with the lover. A secret one-night stand. It's a beautiful song. I cried the first time I really listened to it.

    SquidBrandonon April 05, 2007   Link

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