The song lyrics were written by the band Van Halen, as they were asked to write a song for the 1979 movie "Over the Edge" starring Matt Dillon. The movie (and the lyrics, although more obliquely) are about bored, rebellious youth with nothing better to do than get into trouble. If you see the movie, these lyrics will make more sense. It's a great movie if you grew up in the 70s/80s you'll definitely remember some of these characters from your own life. Fun fact, after writing the song, Van Halen decided not to let the movie use it.
If I was a rich man, I'd buy you some shoes
Tall boots for all the dirt you walk through
What would that do? Enable you to deal
Without schooling you on how to touch what's real
And if I was a smart man, I'd tell you everything that I knew
And give it to you every time you need a talking to
But what would that do? Teach you my guidelines
So you can be a cheerleader at your game on the sidelines
And if I was a driver, I'd keep my headlights on
To see the difference between right and wrong
I'd wear my seatbelt even when I'm in park
Cause I don't trust the other fools that cruise through these parts
And if I was a better cook, I'd hook up a feast
Set a table full of food for the children to eat
I encourage the nourishment so we can breathe
With the knowledge that we got something accomplished
And if I was Santa Claus, I'd fight for the cause
Wouldn't expect nothing in return
I'd give you everything you want, I'd be everything you need
So you can take my hand and I can take the lead
And if I was an honest man
I would stop writing songs
I'd break for a nervous breakdown for breakfast
Tell everyone I knew to stay away from making music
It ain't nothing but a confusing mess (confusing mess)
And if I was you, I wouldn't hear a word I said
Wouldn't trust nothing to start it up inside my head
I'd make a conscious effort to live instead
Of trying to kill the monsters that reside underneath the bed
And if I was a hurt man
I'd find a way to put my faith
Into a woman that could take me from today, maybe
I need somebody that could save me
From the parts of myself that keep making me crazy
And if I was a wise man
I'd climb to the top of the mountain peak
To think about strength versus weakness
I'd find a point that rests a couple of feet above your head
And figure out how I could try to help you reach it
(Ho ho ho)
And if I did have a choice
I'd never want to live forever
Just let me have a voice so I can make my points
I can't imagine running a race with no finish line
Just let me keep my pace and make to most of my time
I love giving but I'm bad at receiving
The truth is, I'd prefer to be the one bleeding
But I'm a paranoid that stays between play and work
Cautious and aware, 'cause I'm afraid of being hurt
Which brings me to the issue
And that would be this:
How often must I ask myself why I exist?
I feel like a freak, this world is a circus
Just trying to find myself as well as my purpose
[Repeat: x2]
And if I was Santa Claus, I'd fight for the cause
Wouldn't expect nothing in return
I'd give you everything you want, I'd be everything you need
And you can take my hand and I can take the lead
I got nothing but gifts
Keep it up in my wits
Got me drunk on the fifth
And now we're stuck in a ditch
And as dumb as it gets
I'm a run you some fibs
I want to touch your lips
I want to rub your hips
Put a glove on the fist
For the love that exists
We'll keep bumping the hits
To get my bucket of chips
From the Bloods and the Crips
To the skateboarding chicks
Put the Atmosphere on your Christmas wishlist
Put the Atmosphere on your Christmas wishlist
(Ho ho ho ho)
Tall boots for all the dirt you walk through
What would that do? Enable you to deal
Without schooling you on how to touch what's real
And if I was a smart man, I'd tell you everything that I knew
And give it to you every time you need a talking to
But what would that do? Teach you my guidelines
So you can be a cheerleader at your game on the sidelines
And if I was a driver, I'd keep my headlights on
To see the difference between right and wrong
I'd wear my seatbelt even when I'm in park
Cause I don't trust the other fools that cruise through these parts
And if I was a better cook, I'd hook up a feast
Set a table full of food for the children to eat
I encourage the nourishment so we can breathe
With the knowledge that we got something accomplished
And if I was Santa Claus, I'd fight for the cause
Wouldn't expect nothing in return
I'd give you everything you want, I'd be everything you need
So you can take my hand and I can take the lead
And if I was an honest man
I would stop writing songs
I'd break for a nervous breakdown for breakfast
Tell everyone I knew to stay away from making music
It ain't nothing but a confusing mess (confusing mess)
And if I was you, I wouldn't hear a word I said
Wouldn't trust nothing to start it up inside my head
I'd make a conscious effort to live instead
Of trying to kill the monsters that reside underneath the bed
And if I was a hurt man
I'd find a way to put my faith
Into a woman that could take me from today, maybe
I need somebody that could save me
From the parts of myself that keep making me crazy
And if I was a wise man
I'd climb to the top of the mountain peak
To think about strength versus weakness
I'd find a point that rests a couple of feet above your head
And figure out how I could try to help you reach it
(Ho ho ho)
And if I did have a choice
I'd never want to live forever
Just let me have a voice so I can make my points
I can't imagine running a race with no finish line
Just let me keep my pace and make to most of my time
I love giving but I'm bad at receiving
The truth is, I'd prefer to be the one bleeding
But I'm a paranoid that stays between play and work
Cautious and aware, 'cause I'm afraid of being hurt
Which brings me to the issue
And that would be this:
How often must I ask myself why I exist?
I feel like a freak, this world is a circus
Just trying to find myself as well as my purpose
[Repeat: x2]
And if I was Santa Claus, I'd fight for the cause
Wouldn't expect nothing in return
I'd give you everything you want, I'd be everything you need
And you can take my hand and I can take the lead
I got nothing but gifts
Keep it up in my wits
Got me drunk on the fifth
And now we're stuck in a ditch
And as dumb as it gets
I'm a run you some fibs
I want to touch your lips
I want to rub your hips
Put a glove on the fist
For the love that exists
We'll keep bumping the hits
To get my bucket of chips
From the Bloods and the Crips
To the skateboarding chicks
Put the Atmosphere on your Christmas wishlist
Put the Atmosphere on your Christmas wishlist
(Ho ho ho ho)
Lyrics submitted by clifflesniak, edited by GeneDalefield
If I Was Santa Claus Lyrics as written by
Lyrics © UPSIDEDOWN HEART MUSIC, ANT TURN THAT SNARE DOWN
Lyrics powered by LyricFind
Add your thoughts
Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.
Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!
More Featured Meanings
Light Up The Sky
Van Halen
Van Halen
The Night We Met
Lord Huron
Lord Huron
This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Son Şansın - Şarkı Sözleri
Hayalperest
Hayalperest
This song seemingly tackles the methods of deception those who manipulate others use to get victims to follow their demands, as well as diverting attention away from important issues. They'll also use it as a means to convince people to hate or kill others by pretending acts of terrorism were committed by the enemy when the acts themselves were done by the masters of control to promote discrimination and hate. It also reinforces the idea that these manipulative forces operate in various locations, infiltrating everyday life without detection, and propagate any and everywhere.
In general, it highlights the danger of hidden agendas, manipulation, and distraction, serving as a critique of those who exploit chaos and confusion to control and gain power, depicting a cautionary tale against falling into their traps. It encourages us to question the narratives presented to us and remain vigilant against manipulation in various parts of society.
Gentle Hour
Yo La Tengo
Yo La Tengo
This song was originally written by a guy called Peter Gutteridge. He was one of the founders of the "Dunedin Sound" a musical scene in the south of New Zealand in the early 80s. From there it was covered by "The Clean" one of the early bands of that scene (he had originally been a member of in it's early days, writing a couple of their best early songs). The Dunedin sound, and the Clean became popular on american college radio in the mid to late 80s. I guess Yo La Tengo heard that version.
Great version of a great song,
Page
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
There aren’t many things that’ll hurt more than giving love a chance against your better judgement only to have your heart crushed yet again. Ed Sheeran tells such a story on “Page.” On this track, he is devastated to have lost his lover and even more saddened by the feeling that he may never move on from this.
Also, why does he become so much more organized and under control on the very last section?