In regards to the meaning of this song:
Before a live performance on the EP Five Stories Falling, Geoff states “It’s about the last time I went to visit my grandmother in Columbus, and I saw that she was dying and it was the last time I was going to see her. It is about realizing how young you are, but how quickly you can go.”
That’s the thing about Geoff and his sublime poetry, you think it’s about one thing, but really it’s about something entirely different. But the lyrics are still universal and omnipresent, ubiquitous, even. So relatable. That’s one thing I love about this band. I also love their live performances, raw energy and Geoff’s beautiful, imperfectly perfect vocals. His voice soothes my aching soul.
(Chorus x2:)
I'm so hidden and you're never gonna see
I'm cold, forgiven all because of my beliefs
I'm nobody that you ever wanna be
Cause I know that the world is afraid of me
(Monoxide:)
Now you can try to sedate me
Assassinate or just hate me
But there's nothing you can do to me lately
Now I'm greatly accepted in the mind
So I'm confused and intertwined
From being rejected so many times
I wanna leave it all behind
So kind of you to pick up the album and give it a try for once
And run & tell your homies that these mother fuckers'd die for us
So many questions, fingers pointing for answers
Suggestin' that I'm the cancer that lingers inside the pasture
Of green grass, up to my neck in situations
That's too fast to think about it, most people can't dream about
A hundred million miles in every single second
And everytime you hear this record
I want you to feel me on every sentence
Reminisce from descendants of past trenches
We'll embark on a journey that'll stay alive forever
That's how it's standin' over on MY side of the fence
Regardless of the circumstances or the consequence
(chorus)
(Jamie Madrox:)
I am my own worst enemy
I'm not the smartest muthafucka and shit, I don't pretend to be
And why I am the way I am is not a mystery
My mind's not in proper working order, we're in therapy
Deranged, confused and mentally abused
Life's been hanging on a string so what fuck I got to lose?
And what the fuck I got to prove to you?
If you don't know me by now, you'll never know me
You can put that on my REAL homies
I got problems and they stack like bills
And I relate to the broken, bleeding heart love killed
And I awaited in the shadows, awake in the dark
Hopin' to talk to the passed on, I'm falling apart
I'm such a mess, indecisive, fading away
I'm out of touch with society and living today
Never relied on my sanity, I threw it away
To become the maniac that's got your attention today
(chorus)
(Monoxide:)
Can you keep a secret?
Well I'm afraid of the world because they want me to die
Can you believe it? But I'm still alive and been floatin since 95
With my chin held high but I'm so dead inside
That the problems just roll, I put 'em back into a pile
Because it's just a bunch of shit that I can't deal with right now
And I'm tired of always guessin' & messin' it up again
And the next day it's even deeper and I'm steady sinking in
(Jamie Madrox:)
I took a look at myself and came to grips with what I found
It was a vision of a child, disturbed and broke down
No soul, no heart cause I gave it away
No time for feelin' sorry, I'll greive another day
And all those tears are stored in storm clouds
That hover above me, and cover the ugly
Continued to haunt me when I was feelin' low
That's the same reason I'll hold on and never let go
(chorus x4)
I'm so hidden and you're never gonna see
I'm cold, forgiven all because of my beliefs
I'm nobody that you ever wanna be
Cause I know that the world is afraid of me
(Monoxide:)
Now you can try to sedate me
Assassinate or just hate me
But there's nothing you can do to me lately
Now I'm greatly accepted in the mind
So I'm confused and intertwined
From being rejected so many times
I wanna leave it all behind
So kind of you to pick up the album and give it a try for once
And run & tell your homies that these mother fuckers'd die for us
So many questions, fingers pointing for answers
Suggestin' that I'm the cancer that lingers inside the pasture
Of green grass, up to my neck in situations
That's too fast to think about it, most people can't dream about
A hundred million miles in every single second
And everytime you hear this record
I want you to feel me on every sentence
Reminisce from descendants of past trenches
We'll embark on a journey that'll stay alive forever
That's how it's standin' over on MY side of the fence
Regardless of the circumstances or the consequence
(chorus)
(Jamie Madrox:)
I am my own worst enemy
I'm not the smartest muthafucka and shit, I don't pretend to be
And why I am the way I am is not a mystery
My mind's not in proper working order, we're in therapy
Deranged, confused and mentally abused
Life's been hanging on a string so what fuck I got to lose?
And what the fuck I got to prove to you?
If you don't know me by now, you'll never know me
You can put that on my REAL homies
I got problems and they stack like bills
And I relate to the broken, bleeding heart love killed
And I awaited in the shadows, awake in the dark
Hopin' to talk to the passed on, I'm falling apart
I'm such a mess, indecisive, fading away
I'm out of touch with society and living today
Never relied on my sanity, I threw it away
To become the maniac that's got your attention today
(chorus)
(Monoxide:)
Can you keep a secret?
Well I'm afraid of the world because they want me to die
Can you believe it? But I'm still alive and been floatin since 95
With my chin held high but I'm so dead inside
That the problems just roll, I put 'em back into a pile
Because it's just a bunch of shit that I can't deal with right now
And I'm tired of always guessin' & messin' it up again
And the next day it's even deeper and I'm steady sinking in
(Jamie Madrox:)
I took a look at myself and came to grips with what I found
It was a vision of a child, disturbed and broke down
No soul, no heart cause I gave it away
No time for feelin' sorry, I'll greive another day
And all those tears are stored in storm clouds
That hover above me, and cover the ugly
Continued to haunt me when I was feelin' low
That's the same reason I'll hold on and never let go
(chorus x4)
Lyrics submitted by rjbucs28, edited by DarkSidePoet
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