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Uncle Walter Lyrics

Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
'Bout everything he's seen and done
The voice of 50 years experience
He's drunk, watching the television

You know he's been around the world
Last night he flew to Baghdad
In his magical armchair
With cigarettes and a six-pack
Yeah, he just got back
His spit's flying everywhere
Hey, hey, hey, hey

Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
Oh you're back so late
Where did you go that you were gone so long?
And how could you leave me here so long
With Uncle Walter

Your Uncle Walter saw who fired the shots
He drove his chair in the cavalcade
He's flown from South Africa
To countries where
They beat themselves on the backs with chains

There was a fleet of battleships
And one reclining chair
Headed north on the Arabian Sea
Now he's back to tell us what
He and his oldest boy Blair
They're getting rich with their mail-order scheme

Oh, oh,
Your Uncle Walter's going on and on
We're so glad you're home
Where did you go that you were gone so long?
And how could you leave me here so long
With Uncle Walter

Your Uncle Walter told me
Everything he'd do if he was president
Oh, what a perfect world
This world would be
If he was President now
But he's not!

And he sees the children smoking pot
He knows that in a moment
They'll be shooting up heroin
Teardrops in his armchair
A 50-minute lecture
Tobacco juice rolling down his chin
Song Info
Submitted by
kevin On Apr 01, 2001
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Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

The first time i hear the lyric "Last night he flew to Baghdad In his magical armchair" I thought that he said "Last night he found a baguette in his magical armchair" kind of wish it was...

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

...but he's NOT!!!!!!

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

...we all have relatives like this

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

Ben was in a band with older college students when he was in high school and they would go out and leave ben with one of the band members uncle walter. "Where did you go that you were gone so long"....

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

I think this song is hilarious. Probably everyone has been in a situation like this where the person won't shut up and think they are right about everything.

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

The first time i hear the lyric "Last night he flew to Baghdad In his magical armchair" I thought that he said "Last night he found a baguette in his magical armchair" kind of wish it was...

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

I love it when go goes, "but he's NOT!" and also the pot smoking sound effects during the last verse.

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

is it bad that this song reminds me of my grandma...

am I a terrible person??

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

"Where did you go that you were gone so long? And how could you leave me here so long With Uncle Walter"

that sounds so funny^^ i know that situation, when a pesky person tells you so many uninteresting things and your buddy has to leave suddenly and you´re waiting ages until he´s back.

and the piano sounds so great in that song!

Cover art for Uncle Walter lyrics by Ben Folds Five

More generally, the focus is on Walter being a hypocrite.