Suede

"There's this moment in 'Suede' where [the narrator's] being called 'evil' by this other person because of whatever she's done to them in their minds. But there's this side of obsession and passion where one party thinks the other party is doing something to them--and sometimes people aren't always looking at their part in something. In 'Suede,' she knows what she's up to, she knows what she's been doing." [Tori Amos; A.P. Magazine, Oct99]

Those Lyrics that are up there are not completely right . They are missing some line in there so here are the proper ones.

suede you always felt like suede there are days i feel your twin peekaboo hiding underneath your skin jets are revving yes revving from a central source and this has power over me not because you feel something or don't feel something for me but because mass. is so big it can swallow swallow her whole star intact call me 'evil' call me 'tide is on your side' anything that you want

anybody knows you can conjure anything by the dark of the moon

boy and if you keep your silence silencer on you'll talk yourself right into a job out of a hole into my bayou

i'm sure that you've been briefed my absorbtion lines they are frayed and i fear my fear is greater than my faith but i walk the missionary way you always felt like suede there are days i am your twin peekaboo hiding underneath your skin jets are revving yes revving from an ether twist call me 'evil' call me 'tide is on your side' anything you want

anybody knows you can conjure anything by the dark of the moon

boy and if you keep your silence silencer on you'll talk yourself right into a job out of a hole and into my bayou into my, my bayou suede

oh little sister, i hope you didn't feel that way oh little sister, i'm glad you came, and i said oh little sister, i hoped you wouldn't feel that way oh little sister, oh again, and i said oh little sister, i hope you didn't feel that way oh little sister, i'm still glad you came, i said oh little sister, i wish you didn't feel that way, and oh little sister, said, i'd do the same, do the same oh little sister, i hoped you wouldn't feel that way oh, i said, i wish oh little sister, can you forgive me one day can you forgive me suede

Much Better!!

I must say that I now feel like a total dweeb because I honestly thought it said "everybody knows you CAN'T conjure anything by the dark of the moon". And I thought that because it was what made sense to me.....since conjuring is normally done at the full moon and the dark moon is reserved for banishing. However, I looked at the lyrics again in the CD insert and the "can" is correct. Which means she is speaking of dark or black magic. Good to know! Now I am wondering if I'm the only one that was so mistaken on that, even though I do see why I had it wrong.

This particular song spoke to me, and still does when I hear it. I feel this duality that she is talking about. I have felt that other person inside of me, too, "hiding underneath the skin." This slick, suede, person that is different from what you usually consider to be "yourself." And this person is just as much part of you as they are foreign to you. (Like in Cruel, also by Tori) But sometimes this other persona just seems to take over, (mass so big it can swallow her whole star intact) and can make you wonder where the line is between yourself and this other persona that pops up from time to time and confuses things (my absorption lines are frayed).

Now I see how this sounds like a schizo, the dual personalities thing, but everytime I have ever encountered this "alternate me" is when I find I have done or I am in the act of doing something that I didn't think I was capable of doing. Usually it was all bad stuff... like in the song, "call me 'evil', call me 'tide is on your side', anything you want. anybody knows you can conjure anything by the dark of the moon." Like anybody knows you can get into just about anything when the sun goes down. In my 20s I did some weird sneaking around type stuff- it was weird - and I remember physically saying out loud to myself, "What are you doing?!" But something had a hold on me... and I couldn't talk myself into just stopping.

But when I go through these spells - it never lasts too long. and in the end it all kind of washes out, and I want to just separate myself from myself! Worn out and ragged... what is left over, what is left after all the drama is over, is just heartbroken. And that's where the song really sings - "Oh little sister, I hoped you wouldn't feel that way. Oh little sister, you'll forgive me one day." -Suede. And it does take time before you can forgive yourself for the things you've done that you can't believe you were capable of doing. Some people would think of it as a bad memory and leave it at that. But I remember my actions as deliberate, and there was a wildness to me, something feral, something primal, something different. And Tori calls hers Suede. I don't know what to call mine. I think Suede will suffice. And I hope Suede doesn't show up again too soon.

I know someone out there knows what I mean.