This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
I don't want to be the filler if the void is solely yours
I don't want to be your glass of single malt whiskey
Hidden in the bottom drawer and
I don't want to be a bandage if the wound is not mine
Lend me some fresh air
I don't want to be adored for what I merely represent to you
I don't want to be your babysitter
You're a very big boy now
I don't want to be your mother
I didn't carry you in my womb for nine months
Show me the back door
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
I don't want to be the sweeper of the egg shells that you walk upon
And I don't want to be your other half, I believe that one and one make two
I don't want to be your food or the light from the fridge on your face
At midnight, hey
What are you hungry for?
I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together
I don't want to be your idol
See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights
I don't want to be lived through
A vicarious occasion
Please open the window
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
I don't want to live on someday when my motto is last week
And I, I don't want to be responsible for your fractured heart
And it's wounded beat and
I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling
Well, what do you thank me
What do you thank me for?
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
I don't want to be your glass of single malt whiskey
Hidden in the bottom drawer and
I don't want to be a bandage if the wound is not mine
Lend me some fresh air
I don't want to be adored for what I merely represent to you
I don't want to be your babysitter
You're a very big boy now
I don't want to be your mother
I didn't carry you in my womb for nine months
Show me the back door
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
I don't want to be the sweeper of the egg shells that you walk upon
And I don't want to be your other half, I believe that one and one make two
I don't want to be your food or the light from the fridge on your face
At midnight, hey
What are you hungry for?
I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together
I don't want to be your idol
See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights
I don't want to be lived through
A vicarious occasion
Please open the window
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
I don't want to live on someday when my motto is last week
And I, I don't want to be responsible for your fractured heart
And it's wounded beat and
I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling
Well, what do you thank me
What do you thank me for?
Visiting hours are nine to five and if I show up at ten past six
Well, I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor
Lyrics submitted by Boonechic_21, edited by daniel1010
Not The Doctor Lyrics as written by Alanis Nadine Morissette Glen Ballard
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, CONCORD MUSIC PUBLISHING LLC
Lyrics powered by LyricFind
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I don't think this song is necessarily trying to be specific about what situation this guy is doing it in, but somewhere along the line someone is depending on her for all the wrong reasons - maybe she has a problem with it coz she's wondering if he doesn't love her exactly, just NEEDS her - and I agree, he needs her for the things he's not getting elsewhere. He's put her on her pedestal because so far she's been responsive to these needs. But would he still want to be together if it meant just simply "being" with her for a change? She represents the person who is holding up someone else through their troubles and has sacrificed her needs in order to listen to or cater top her partner exhaustedly.