Pulled up as he parked the car
then he took his feet and walked right up to the door.
Went inside looking slick as snot
with his smile so suave that the women all dropped.
Bag in hand with his hammer inside it.
Shoes so shiny with his Cuban cigar lit
down two steps and to the right.
Lucky ten was his number tonight.

Stepped on up with an arrow in sight.
From the middle,1,2,3, to the right
out for the hand shake up for the call,
watch and see those rednecks fall.
Who is he? King of polyester.
Who is he? King of polyester.
Who is he? King of polyester.
What does he do?

One after another he watched them fall,
his mighty hook was way to much for them all.
The people cheered as they swept them away
he turned around and said well what can I say
halfway there with no sweat in sight
he swung once again and knocked them down with all of his might
7, 8, 9 without a problem the room grew silent as he came upon ten.

Two down with one to go.
If he gets the last one it will quite a show.
His arm swung forward as he let it go.
The air was shattered by the force of the throw
down the alley with his perfect hook.
He hit them so hard the whole room shook
people cheered as they hit the ground.
Their ears were deafened by the crushing sound.
Waved to the people as he picked up his bag
grabbed his cigar and his black silk rag.
Up two steps and to the right,
out the door be back tomorrow night

Lyrics submitted by NeoNess

King Of Polyester song meanings
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  • +1
    General CommentIt's about bowling!
    It just clicked for me!

    Ha... "watch and see those rednecks fall"... bowling pins have red stripes and so they have "red necks."

    "One after another he watched them fall"
    He's getting a strike.

    Man.... awesome haha.
    iforgoton August 23, 2006   Link
  • 0
    My Interpretation(I love this song.)
    iforgot is right. The song is a riddle. It uses ambiguous language and confusing terminology, but it is indeed about bowling.

    However, the song's focus is a man. This man is incredibly stylish, genteel and dapper, and he is amazing at bowling. Most modern bowling balls made since the 1970's, are made of polyester. *cough* title drop *cough*. Polyester bowling balls are also well-documented for being relatively straight once they hit the lane. They're not as prone to "hooking" erratically.

    Let's see some backing. The song tells us the man looks "slick as snot," has a suave smile, carries his own bowling bag and ball (called a hammer in the song), has shined shoes and is smoking a Cuban cigar.

    That last bit is definitely noteworthy. Cuban cigars are still illegal to import or purchase in the United States, which we can reasonably assume this song's setting is. The W's formed in Oregon and Bowling is fairly common in the US. The presence of a Cuban cigar can simply mean he's a rebel.

    I'm iffy the legal implications of him smoking indoors, but I'm sure he's just so cool he can get away with it.

    But anyway, the man arrives at the bowling alley and starts rackin' up strikes. His form is excellent. A crowd begins to take notice and cheer him on. The man appreciates the attention ("well, what can I say?") and proceeds to strike his 7th, 8th and 9th frames. The crowd quiets down as he attempts his tenth.

    He gets two strikes on the tenth frame, opening up a third opportunity. Should he make this last strike, it would be a "perfect game". The song builds up tension in its own upbeat, irreverent way by devoting a whole verse to it.

    But... it never tells us if the guy actually makes the shot. We hear a crushing sound, see the audience cheer, and watch him leave, with the intent on returning tomorrow. It's IMPLIED that he got it, but that last sentence makes at least me wonder.

    One thing the song repeats over and over is "Who is he?"
    This could be a crowd member's reaction to the man who looks good and performs well. I see it as the songwriter's goal. First of all, it pushes the listener to solve the riddle and discover the heavy bowling influence. Second of all, it pushes the listener to focus on the man. Who is the man? If I had to say the man was an actual person, I'd say he's a darker and edgier Andrew Schar, since he was the only member of the band to have actually played in a bowling league.

    But he's not. The King of Polyester is simply the epitome of cool. He's good-looking, talented (or at least well-practiced), and he seems to be having a good time.

    That's all. RACK 'EM UP!
    e4439qv5on March 11, 2014   Link

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