• Today was ok. I had a good cry last night. It was hard to cry again. I would have much rather smoked a cigarette. Today was funny. I woke up listening to 80s music. Like romeo void and kagagooroo and the cure. It makes me happy. Everyone is telling me that they think Im pregnant. The one time Im confident that Im not. My mom my aunt gossipers and Jose. But I know Im not... right?? I guess that happens sometimes. If I did have a baby I would honestly be happy. It would be a big regret but my baby daddy is not a good guy. I attract crazies. He is in love with me but I dont even like him. I say in love like only a crazy guy can be. I just keep thinking if its a girl its name is going to be Teilula and a boy name is Johnny. Those are my favorite names. I would be a good mommy. but I would be scared to explain my life. I would be afraid I would hurt them. Jose says I should get an abortion if I am. That is so sad. What if I never get pregnant?? That is my flesh. Those are 23 of my chromisomes.

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