Get 'em laughing - keep 'em there,
You hold your own and they'll hold their's,
Hold their glasses - can't hold their beer
Tell 'em the one about the fucking queer.
Do the one that always works,
'Bout the lazy blacks that don't like work,
And once you got 'em, keep 'em there
Raise their spirits! Raise their cheer!

Do that one that never fails,
'Bout the gang of white thugs and the Asian male,
And once you got 'em, they'll be with you!
See this lot's loyal, through and through.

Tell Irish jokes and you can't miss,
Do the building site one and how they're all thick.
Keep 'em laughing - you'll have it made,
We're a friendly lot and you'll be well paid.

But keep 'em laughing don't let it stop
Or the truth might catch up and spoil the plot.



Lyrics submitted by redmax

The Stand Up Comic's Instructions Lyrics as written by Paul John Weller

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

Lyrics powered by LyricFind

The Stand Up Comic's Instructions song meanings
Add Your Thoughts

4 Comments

sort form View by:
  • 0
    General Comment

    The song is about a stereotypical racist/homophobic overly nationalist comedy act and how Paul thinks its cliche and low brow to even consider doing an act so played out on top of the fact of it being just wrong.

    Neonsolidon June 22, 2008   Link

Add your thoughts

Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.

Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!