This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Picture yourself
Sleeping on a plane
There's something ticking in the overhead
And inside your brains
There's bodies in the water
And bodies in your basement
If heaven's for clean people, it's vacant
And hey, are you, are you, are you, are you, you know?
Hey, are you, are you, are you being careful?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you lukewarm?
Hey, yeah, you are
I'm frantic
So load me up
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Picture yourself swimming in an ocean
A million miles from nowhere and the nearest phone
There's bodies in the water
Floating all around you
And all of them are talking, and they're comedians
And hey, are you, are you, are you, are you, you know?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you special?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you deformed?
Hey, yeah, you are
I'm frantic
So load me up
It seems so practiced
Me fucking this up
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out, yeah
Picture yourself at the MGM grand
Murphy's fighting Hokem
You're in the stands and
There's somebody in the water
In the middle of the ocean
A million miles from nowhere
And they're alone
I'm there alone
So, so deformed
So, so deformed
So, so deformed
I'm frantic
So load me up
This seems so practiced
Take me and take me, and take me
All the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Sleeping on a plane
There's something ticking in the overhead
And inside your brains
There's bodies in the water
And bodies in your basement
If heaven's for clean people, it's vacant
And hey, are you, are you, are you, are you, you know?
Hey, are you, are you, are you being careful?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you lukewarm?
Hey, yeah, you are
I'm frantic
So load me up
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Picture yourself swimming in an ocean
A million miles from nowhere and the nearest phone
There's bodies in the water
Floating all around you
And all of them are talking, and they're comedians
And hey, are you, are you, are you, are you, you know?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you special?
Hey, are you, are you, are you, are you deformed?
Hey, yeah, you are
I'm frantic
So load me up
It seems so practiced
Me fucking this up
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out, yeah
Picture yourself at the MGM grand
Murphy's fighting Hokem
You're in the stands and
There's somebody in the water
In the middle of the ocean
A million miles from nowhere
And they're alone
I'm there alone
So, so deformed
So, so deformed
So, so deformed
I'm frantic
So load me up
This seems so practiced
Take me and take me, and take me
All the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Whatever puts me all the way out
Lyrics submitted by Little Butcher Boy, edited by FirstNorman
Load Me Up Lyrics as written by Ian Browne Dave Genn
Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Lyrics powered by LyricFind
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This is not so much to do with the lyrics of the song as much as the video. I heard that Matt Good suffers from panic attacks, so it comes to mind whenever I watch the video. He is being chased and he ends up alone because the rest of the band is attacked by disgruntled institutionalized teenagers (which could probably have some symbolism in itself). So he's all frantic, running away, by himself and realizes the only way to stop this panic is to give in and run into the persuing kids and let them rip him to shreds. "what ever puts me all the way out", to get away from all of the danger that is around every corner.
About the lyrics though. Every piece of imagery used, "picture yourself..." begins very calm and pleasant but then changes to something dangerous (not to mention very unlikely). I feel that way a lot. Taking a simple situation and overanalysing it, calculating the worst possible scenerio... "it seems so practiced, me fucking this up", again assuming the worst in every situation, paranoid that you will fuck anything up, because it seems to always end up that way.
I think that this song is for anybody who thinks too much.
"load me up" could very well be with drugs of whatever form, sleeping pills makes sense. From the video though, I kind of saw it as facing the thoughts head on by building up your energy enough to jump into the situation. But that's a bit obscure...I suppose.