"Step Right Up" as written by and Benjamin Heyward Allen Tom Waits....
Step right up, step right up, step right up,
Everyone's a winner, bargains galore
That's right, you too can be the proud owner
Of the quality goes in before the name goes on
One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar, we got service after sales
You need perfume? we got perfume, how 'bout an engagement ring?
Something for the little lady, something for the little lady,
Something for the little lady, hmm
Three for a dollar
We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale
And a smoke-damaged furniture, you can drive it away today
Act now, act now, and receive as our gift, our gift to you
They come in all colors, one size fits all
No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery
Everything must go, going out of business, going out of business
Going out of business sale
Fifty percent off original retail price, skip the middle man
Don't settle for less
How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume
Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate
Don't be caught with your drawers down,
Don't be caught with your drawers down
You can step right up, step right up
That's right, it fillets, it chops, it dices, slices,
Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school
It gets rid of unwanted facial hair, it gets rid of embarrassing age spots,
It delivers a pizza, and it lengthens, and it strengthens
And it finds that slipper that's been at large
Under the chaise lounge for several weeks
And it plays a mean Rhythm Master,
It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
And it's only a dollar, step right up, it's only a dollar, step right up
'Cause it forges your signature
If not completely satisfied, mail back unused portion of product
For complete refund of price of purchase
Step right up
Please allow thirty days for delivery, don't be fooled by cheap imitations
You can live in it, live in it, laugh in it, love in it
Swim in it, sleep in it,
Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it
Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets, that's right
And it entertains visiting relatives, it turns a sandwich into a banquet
Tired of being the life of the party?
Change your shorts, change your life, change your life
Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy, get rid of your wife,
And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax
Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack, see you later alligator
See you later alligator
And it steals your car
It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking
It's a friend, and it's a companion,
And it's the only product you will ever need
Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing
Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff,
Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job, it is a job
And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange,
And it gives you denture breath
And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion
And it gets rid of your traveler's checks
It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned
Well it takes care of business, never needs winding,
Never needs winding, never needs winding
Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis,
Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy,
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon
Cause it's effective, it's defective, it creates household odors,
It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection
It gives you an erection, it wins the election
Why put up with painful corns any longer?
It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation, no salesman will visit your home
We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot, prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed
How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it
We need your business, we're going out of business
We'll give you the business
Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale
Receive our free brochure, free brochure
Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included
Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available,
Step right up, step right up, step right up
You got it buddy: the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away
Step right up, you can step right up, you can step right up
C'mon step right up
(Get away from me kid, you bother me...)
Step right up, step right up, step right up, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon
Step right up, you can step right up, c'mon and step right up,
C'mon and step right up


Lyrics submitted by yuri_sucupira

"Step Right Up" as written by Tom Waits Elijah Abbott Jones

Lyrics © BMG RIGHTS MANAGEMENT US, LLC

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Step Right Up song meanings
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21 Comments

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  • +1
    General Commentsounds like he's trying to sell drugs.
    "service after sales, No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery, it slices it dices and it lasts a lifetime, it forges your signature and gives you excuses for the lipstick on your collar. it's a friend, a companion, and gives you denture breath, etc etc etc etc."
    so tom's a drug salesman now...
    reckless1on October 04, 2007   Link
  • +1
    General CommentTom Waits is a genious and I absolutly love this song. It is defenitely about the snakey salesmen that live and are around today. It does everything and that is exactly where our country is headed today. We will soon have this one product that does all for us, just look at the ipod, turned video game, turned internet accessable, pretty soon you will be able to rent movies and basically everything else that Tom Waits says
    Eatapch4pceon January 22, 2009   Link
  • +1
    General CommentI love the part where it sounds like he's turned around the is shoving away some kid while mumbling, "Get away from me kid you're bothering me..."

    Very impressive if you can sing along with the entire song haha.
    IrishMan44on March 24, 2015   Link
  • 0
    General Commentgod... this song is marvellous! i hadn't read the lyrics, and now i find that it's about somebody trying to sell something to another guy! hahaha, Tom Waits is a true genius
    PiKueloon June 25, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General Commenttruly, it's as if no one can comment on his music except for Waits himself
    Cobra-corneliuson December 01, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General CommentI think the song is about more than a man trying to sell some products to another man. Obviosly this represents the consumption-community, and how money and possesion determens our whole life.
    For example:
    "That's right, it filets, it chops, it dices, slices,
    Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
    And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school "
    this passage is about how people sell their responsabilities to other people.
    "Tired of being the life of the party?
    Change your shorts, change your life, change your life "
    is about the way businessman, and commercial developers use our complexes to make us buy their products(beautyproducts...)
    Sander_vnon December 10, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General CommentIts about how ridiculously commercialised everything has become...
    Chilli220on July 20, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General CommentTotally. Ironically, The Frito-Lay company totally ripped off this song and used it (well, a song based on it) in a commercial selling Doritos. Tom Waits sued them and won - he's one of the few artists left with the integrity to not want his music used in commercials.
    thitheron July 28, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General CommentTom Waits is awesome this song is about snake oil salesmen on the surface, it's just a fun song to listen to.
    BeatJunkie08on March 16, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General CommentThere's stuff in there typical of all different kinds of advertising, from print ("Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included") to TV ("No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery") to the sketchy guy selling fake rolexes and cheap jewelry on the street ("How 'bout perfume? We got perfume! Something for the little lady"). I like some of Tom's surreal warping of ad cliches; notice that it *gives* you dandruff and denture breath rather than curing these things, and that it doesn't actually clean unwanted lipstick stains on your collar, it just makes up a good excuse for you to tell your girlfriend when she notices them.
    destroyalltacoson June 19, 2006   Link

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