Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
I'm not a cool guy anymore
As if I ever was before
I took a look at all the signs
Then rolled it over in my mind
The feelings I could not release
Became a bitter part of me
What was I thinking of?
It couldn't stay the way it was
I looked at my reflection
And I saw a stranger's face
I saw where I was going
And I had to walk away
I lost a girl, it's Just as well
She tried to save me from myself
I've still got her on my mind
Tossing and turning in my bed
But if she had stayed another week
I would have dragged her down with me
She took it till she'd had enough
Is that what I though love was?
I told her "see you later"
But it's hard to see at all
At the bottom of the barrel
With your back against the wall
I'm not a cool guy anymore
Left it behind, then locked the door
I know you can't escape the past
Now I look back and have to laugh
I was my worst enemy
It almost got the best of me
What was I thinking of?
It couldn't stay the way it was
I looked up one day and saw that
It was up to me
You can only be a victim if you
Admit defeat
As if I ever was before
I took a look at all the signs
Then rolled it over in my mind
The feelings I could not release
Became a bitter part of me
What was I thinking of?
It couldn't stay the way it was
I looked at my reflection
And I saw a stranger's face
I saw where I was going
And I had to walk away
I lost a girl, it's Just as well
She tried to save me from myself
I've still got her on my mind
Tossing and turning in my bed
But if she had stayed another week
I would have dragged her down with me
She took it till she'd had enough
Is that what I though love was?
I told her "see you later"
But it's hard to see at all
At the bottom of the barrel
With your back against the wall
I'm not a cool guy anymore
Left it behind, then locked the door
I know you can't escape the past
Now I look back and have to laugh
I was my worst enemy
It almost got the best of me
What was I thinking of?
It couldn't stay the way it was
I looked up one day and saw that
It was up to me
You can only be a victim if you
Admit defeat
Lyrics submitted by black_cow_of_death
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This is one of my favorite songs. https://fnfgo.io
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