This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Hollow this and maybe you can
Swallow this I don't know
I guess it always seems
That something else in this life is diseased
But guess what now
Here's something that you can't devour
It's something moving with the tide
And now it's ripping you up from inside
Follow me into the abyss of the windfall
That's tearing you down
It's okay to believe
That there's something in nothing now
I'm at the end of my rope
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble again
Please rewind, retrace your life
And then you'll find
That everything you learned in this
Is just a pile of worthlessness
So suffocate
And maybe you can separate
And in the end, it's no surprise
That only in death will you realize
I'm at the end of my rope
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble down again
If it's true, it's just to pass the time
Just to pacify my will to bind
You can't drive when you're blind
And it burns your eyes
That you can't hold me to a place in time
Where I'm stuck behind
You can't climb out of the flood, the sign
Listen to the lies that cut you up inside
And the blood will stain our lives
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble
I'll bet
I would play dead
If I could live
I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
Swallow this I don't know
I guess it always seems
That something else in this life is diseased
But guess what now
Here's something that you can't devour
It's something moving with the tide
And now it's ripping you up from inside
Follow me into the abyss of the windfall
That's tearing you down
It's okay to believe
That there's something in nothing now
I'm at the end of my rope
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble again
Please rewind, retrace your life
And then you'll find
That everything you learned in this
Is just a pile of worthlessness
So suffocate
And maybe you can separate
And in the end, it's no surprise
That only in death will you realize
I'm at the end of my rope
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble down again
If it's true, it's just to pass the time
Just to pacify my will to bind
You can't drive when you're blind
And it burns your eyes
That you can't hold me to a place in time
Where I'm stuck behind
You can't climb out of the flood, the sign
Listen to the lies that cut you up inside
And the blood will stain our lives
If I could give
I'll bet I would play dead
If I could live, I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
I'd crumble
I'll bet
I would play dead
If I could live
I'd fall apart again
If I could fly
Away from all this pain
If I could run
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think its a bit suicidal