This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Nineteen ninety eight looked great on
Plain white paper on the fiftieth plane to champaign
But to tell you the truth
If I had a chance to kill it
I'd pick it up and take it and shake it and
Kiss it to death
There's something inside like a conscience
That says "you're painting floors while
Your pals are renaming the stars
Get up get up and go do what you started
If you want to be a martyr, try harder"
Go my son have you grown?
Go make a home
And put the kids in their beds
And I will talk about this year
If there was something to talk about
And you sell and you sell with your heart
So you can make a few bucks and lose a few friends
And this is the stuff that makes you
And it will be the same that breaks you
Move on get on with your life
It's pointless to play if you don't get paid
Why not go my son have you grown?
Go make a home
And put the kids in their beds
The kid's in our heads
We've got a lot of great mistakes to make
We've got a lot of chances to take
So let's take our time and hurry
Go my son has come home
I said no and made my own
And put the kids in their beds
The kid's in our heads
We've got a lot of people to fear this year
So addy if you want to be near
Sing will to the wind and worry
Oh addy do I love you
But god such things I have to do
Addy do I want to hear you
But I just can't get through
Addy do I miss you
These dreams I sing when I
Kiss you
Oh addy do I love you
But got such things I have to do
Ady do I want to hold you
But anyone may do
Addy do I miss you
These dreams I sing when I'm
Introducing the new nathan detroits
Plain white paper on the fiftieth plane to champaign
But to tell you the truth
If I had a chance to kill it
I'd pick it up and take it and shake it and
Kiss it to death
There's something inside like a conscience
That says "you're painting floors while
Your pals are renaming the stars
Get up get up and go do what you started
If you want to be a martyr, try harder"
Go my son have you grown?
Go make a home
And put the kids in their beds
And I will talk about this year
If there was something to talk about
And you sell and you sell with your heart
So you can make a few bucks and lose a few friends
And this is the stuff that makes you
And it will be the same that breaks you
Move on get on with your life
It's pointless to play if you don't get paid
Why not go my son have you grown?
Go make a home
And put the kids in their beds
The kid's in our heads
We've got a lot of great mistakes to make
We've got a lot of chances to take
So let's take our time and hurry
Go my son has come home
I said no and made my own
And put the kids in their beds
The kid's in our heads
We've got a lot of people to fear this year
So addy if you want to be near
Sing will to the wind and worry
Oh addy do I love you
But god such things I have to do
Addy do I want to hear you
But I just can't get through
Addy do I miss you
These dreams I sing when I
Kiss you
Oh addy do I love you
But got such things I have to do
Ady do I want to hold you
But anyone may do
Addy do I miss you
These dreams I sing when I'm
Introducing the new nathan detroits
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"and you sell and you sell with your heart so you can make a few bucks and lose a few friends and this is the stuff that makes you and it will be the same that breaks you"
that's so key. i think anyone who tries their hand at writing // being in a band // artistic can relate to this. you want to stay true to yourself and what you believe.... but that is often not what gets mainstream attention (i.e. the paycheck).
fuck. braid is so honest and brilliant it hurts.