This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
This is where I've got to draw the line
'Cause I refuse to let you think you can play with my mind
Always seems that you think that I'm blind
'Cause there's always certain times when you're hard to find
You're on the go, I'm on the go
We're on the go, I can't catch you no more
Can't see you no more, and it no longer can be ignored
'Cause at once upon a time it was you I adored
You disappeared and left me here out in the cold
And the absence of you is hurting my soul
I didn't know there was an end of the road
It was so easy for you just to let it all go
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
And I refuse
No way I can't take it, baby
I refuse
No way I can't take it, baby
And I refuse
No way, but I refuse to take it anymore
Remember when I told you I could feel the change (change)
You don't touch me the same (the same), don't hold me the same (the same)
No, I don't want you to take all the blame
'Cause I know I had those moments when I caused the pain
This back and forth just like a war with you and me (with you and me)
See we both disagree, have we ever agreed?
This ain't nothing like I thought it would be
Was it all just a dream? Was it ever in my reach?
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
It was your way
Or it was no way (hey)
And I couldn't live that way (no, no, no, oh no)
It was our call (our call)
Then it was your call
'Cause I gave you my all and all (my all and all)
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
No way, I can't take it, baby (no, no)
No way, I can't take it, baby (no)
No way, but I refuse
To take it anymore
No, way I can't take it, baby (oh no, no)
No, way I can't take it, baby (no way)
No way, but I refuse (refuse)
To take it anymore (refuse)
And I refuse (I refuse)
I refuse (I refuse, baby)
And I refuse (oh)
And I refuse
I refuse (said, I refuse)
And I refuse
Said, I refuse to take it anymore
I refuse, yeah yeah
Yeah, refuse
Refuse
'Cause I refuse to let you think you can play with my mind
Always seems that you think that I'm blind
'Cause there's always certain times when you're hard to find
You're on the go, I'm on the go
We're on the go, I can't catch you no more
Can't see you no more, and it no longer can be ignored
'Cause at once upon a time it was you I adored
You disappeared and left me here out in the cold
And the absence of you is hurting my soul
I didn't know there was an end of the road
It was so easy for you just to let it all go
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
And I refuse
No way I can't take it, baby
I refuse
No way I can't take it, baby
And I refuse
No way, but I refuse to take it anymore
Remember when I told you I could feel the change (change)
You don't touch me the same (the same), don't hold me the same (the same)
No, I don't want you to take all the blame
'Cause I know I had those moments when I caused the pain
This back and forth just like a war with you and me (with you and me)
See we both disagree, have we ever agreed?
This ain't nothing like I thought it would be
Was it all just a dream? Was it ever in my reach?
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
It was your way
Or it was no way (hey)
And I couldn't live that way (no, no, no, oh no)
It was our call (our call)
Then it was your call
'Cause I gave you my all and all (my all and all)
And I refuse
I refuse to have one more sleepless night
I refuse
I refuse to let a tear fall out my eye
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to try
I felt like I would die or I could breakdown and cry
And I refuse
I refuse to let you walk back through that door
I refuse
I refuse to let you hurt me anymore
And I refuse
I refuse to continue to ignore
The fact I fell to the floor, the day you walked out my door
No way, I can't take it, baby (no, no)
No way, I can't take it, baby (no)
No way, but I refuse
To take it anymore
No, way I can't take it, baby (oh no, no)
No, way I can't take it, baby (no way)
No way, but I refuse (refuse)
To take it anymore (refuse)
And I refuse (I refuse)
I refuse (I refuse, baby)
And I refuse (oh)
And I refuse
I refuse (said, I refuse)
And I refuse
Said, I refuse to take it anymore
I refuse, yeah yeah
Yeah, refuse
Refuse
Add your thoughts
Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.
Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!
More Featured Meanings
The Night We Met
Lord Huron
Lord Huron
Bron-Y-Aur Stomp
Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin
This is about bronies. They communicate by stomping.
Blue
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
“Blue” is a song about a love that is persisting in the discomfort of the person experiencing the emotion. Ed Sheeran reflects on love lost, and although he wishes his former partner find happiness, he cannot but admit his feelings are still very much there. He expresses the realization that he might never find another on this stringed instrumental by Aaron Dessner.
American Town
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran shares a short story of reconnecting with an old flame on “American Town.” The track is about a holiday Ed Sheeran spends with his countrywoman who resides in America. The two are back together after a long period apart, and get around to enjoying a bunch of fun activities while rekindling the flames of their romance.
Page
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran
There aren’t many things that’ll hurt more than giving love a chance against your better judgement only to have your heart crushed yet again. Ed Sheeran tells such a story on “Page.” On this track, he is devastated to have lost his lover and even more saddened by the feeling that he may never move on from this.
this song is wonderful. The girl is tired of having her heart borken by that guy.