EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
THOMAS JEFFERSON!
VERSUS!
FREDERICK DOUGLAS!
BEGIN!

J:
When in the course of human events
It becomes necessary for a battle to commence
Then Kplow! I hit 'em with the illness of my quill
Im endowed with certain Unalienable skills
Lemme run down my resume, will ya?
Set up a lil place called the United States, sound familiar?
I told King George he can eat a fat dick
When it comes to declarations im a first draft pick
I'll topple any tyrant so kings and pirates beware
Im so down with revolutions I invented the swivel chair
I've many volumes on my shelves, its true
But I've yet to read the three books you wrote about YOU!
Looking like a skunk in a three piece suit
Didnt come back from paris to battle Pepe le Pew!
First secretary of state, VP Number 2
Not to mention 3rd President, the fuck did you do?

F:
You finished? Okay
Straight out of Bondage!
Brainy motherfucker here to diss you!
Big hair, big nuts, big issues!
Started with your nickel, there's a real declaration
Heads for racists, tails for slave plantations
You're a soft white Monticello Marshmallow
Watching my people sweat while you sat there playin' cello (Hello!)
But now you're facing me! Freddy D!
Id never work for your ass but ill kick it for free
Your stone face on Rushmore aint nothin!
Check my photos, now THATS real mugging!
The face of a free man! Taught himself to read, man!
No compromise, you couldn't whip 1/5th of me, man!
you got a self evident truth of your own
You let freedom ring but never picked up the phone

J:
Aw, Frederick, Ive never heard a verse I dug less
Alright, I admit it, I confess
I participated in a broken system that I hated
But I needed to keep my financial status situated
And the words that I used were a hideous blot
To describe the slave trade and the pain it hath brought
But I fought to stop the trade of new slaves in Virginia
When I ran the whole state and still made it home for dinner
So forgive me, I was busy. Man, I had a lot to do
But we did it! You're free now! So...we cool?

F:
This ain't Louisiana, man. I ain't buying it
You talk about freedom but you aint applying shit
So no, we ain't cool. You founding absentee father
You had six babies with your slave mama and never even bothered
To free her when you died on the 4th of July
Its a very important holiday but what the fucks it mean to this guy?
Because I celebrate December 6th, 1865
The day the 13th damn ammendment was ratified
And I ceased to be an alien to your unalienable rights
And we the people stopped meaning we the people who are white
Man, you did some good things, I aint denying your fame
Im just saying they need to put an asterisk next to your name

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP (RAP RAP RAP RAP..)
BATTLES (BATTLE BATTLE BATTLE...)
OF HISTORY!


Lyrics submitted by Jirachibi

Frederick Douglas Vs. Thomas Jefferson song meanings
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