EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
AL CAPONE!
VERSUS!
BLACKBEARD!
BEGIN!

Blackbeard:
I come strapped with six pistols and a dagger
Walk under the black flag with the scallywag swagger
Aint no parrot on my shoulder and no rings in my ear
Im an irate pirate, real swashbuckling bucaneer!
Beef with me? Please! Im the high sea ceaser
My cold heart is many degrees beneath the deep freezer
You're an obese, greasy, sleeze, squeezing a diseased peter
That no skeezer would touch if she had 50 foot tweezers!
Dont start a war with me, you're not hardcore!
Ill pimp slap those face scars of yours port and starboard!
You spent time in Alkatraz, im sure you were fine
If you dropped the soap as little as you dropped dope rhymes!

Capone:
Im a busy man, Captain Crunch, so ill make this quick
Im ruining Pirates faster than Johnny Depp did
I had syphilis, yeah. Well you're a huge dick
On a scurvy ridden ship filled with bilge rat pricks
I run an intricate criminal syndicate so show respect
or get that tongue ripped out your neck and shoved straight up your poop-deck
Been slapping bitch ass teachers since I was 14
You aint a tough guy, my kids dress up like you for Halloween
Ill use that fuse in your hat to light up all your buddies
And burn your sailboat down to collect the insurance money
Then maybe they'll find your bloated body dead, washed up on a beach
This is Capone rapping and im cappin' this captain, capisch?

Blackbeard:
Arg! The valentines massacre brought you condemnation
But im gonna sink you faster than your income tax evasion
When I toss you overboard like a mob abomination
So prepare to learn the Davy Jones Locker combination!
Fourty cannon on the queen end, your gang cant stop it!
Ill pilfer all your rum and sell it back at a profit
'cause im a criminal legend with a badass name
You're a fat thug with an STD in his brain!

Capone:
C'mon! They chopped off your head and they hung it from a rope
The only legend you left was your prohibition on soap
I mean that rat nest beard's trapped so many crumbs
This bum could get marooned and still eat lunch for a month!
Im the emcee assassin slash like Edward Kenway
Raps so hard call me Al, Dente.
Take your little slope John B. and go home
Tell South Carolina Blackbeard got CaPwnd

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP! EPIC RAP! EPIC RAP! EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!


Lyrics submitted by Jirachibi

Blackbeard vs. Al Capone song meanings
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