Ladies and gentlemen of the Geonosian Gladiator Area, presenting the epic battle of a Star Trek redshirt and a Star Wars Storm Trooper.

I'm wearing red and I'm expendable.
You need me dead?
I am dependable.
You need me alive?
I'm not your guy.
'Cause on the surface, where Spock and Kirk is, it's almost certain that I'm gonna die!
Expendable am I.

When it comes to shooting, I'm just terrible.
I shot at 210 rebels and didn't hit a single guy.
I couldn't hit the Death Star while on the Death Star.
I'd probably shoot my foot and then I'd cry!
A terrible shot am I.

Back at the academy, no one was as bad as me, though I tried my very best.
Made my teachers all irate.
Puked from everything I ate.
Got an 'F' on every test.
Though excellin' was my wish, I broke the main deflector dish, and they threw me out of class.
Then they caught me raisin' heck naked on the holodeck.
I thought there's no way I can pass.
Then, just when I thought that I was screwed, they said...
Tim: "We've got the perfect job for you."
Voltaire: "You do?"

"You'll be expendable.
You will wear red and be expendable.
For getting dead, you are dependable.
In fact, you are the perfect guy.
If shields are down or we blow a warp core, it's almost guaranteed you're gonna fry!
Voltaire: Am I?

Back when I was just a teen, growing up on Tatooine, Beggar's Canyon was my scene.
But my aim was really bad.
Couldn't bull's eye a Womp Rat with my trusty T-16.
This made me a little stressed.
More than just a bit depressed.
Drowned my tears in Anchorhead.
There I met a man named Biggs.
Said he had the perfect gig to put me to the test.
And just when I thought that I was screwed, he said...
Robert: "I've got the perfect job for you."
Jason: "You do?"

"You will be terrible.
When it comes to shooting, you're just terrible.
You'll shoot at 210 Gungans and not a single one will die.
We'll get the last laugh on Palpatine's ass by building him an army of guys so terrible."
Jason: Am I?

Voltaire: And that's how I became a redshirt.
Jason: And that's how I became a Trooper.
Voltaire: And though apart we are pathetic...
Voltaire & Jason: ...together we are super-duper.
Jason: I'll shoot at you at you from foot or two and yet, much to your surprise, I'll miss you.
Voltaire: Yet I'll still die.
Jason: I'll miss you!
Voltaire: Yet I'll still...
Voltaire, Jason, Robert, & Tim: ...find a way to die!

Lyrics submitted by TR_Jessie

Expendable (Feat. Jason Charles Miller, Robert Picardo, & Tim Russ) song meanings
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