"Hello Patient 24602."
I'm sorry- Hello, how-
"How are you feeling?"
Um, not great...
"Has the treatment been working?"
I don't think so... No.
"What are your remaining symptoms?"
I just- I... I internalize my feelings a lot, I have trouble articulating how I am feeling to other people, I feel like I just-
"So basically you're still a little bitch."
Yes, very mature of you, disembodied voice way up there-
"I was just joking, nigga."
Alright, you're not as safe in Wisconsin as you might think with that shit-
"I'm not human, I can say whatever I want."
Okay, just- just get to the point. What's wrong with me? Please, please...
"Your emotions and your logic are at war."
Okay...
"Your creativity and your analysis are at war. And most simply your left and right brain are at war."
My left and my-
"To fix the problem you must separate them from each other. Splitting your neurological functions in 5..."
Well- we book "4..." an appointment or something "3..." you don't just start counting down "2..." to major "1..." medical procedures.
"This might hurt a bit."
I don't even know what 'it' is!
"0."
JUST TELL ME WHA-

"Isolation complete."

"This is Bo's Left Brain. Objective, logical, cold, analytical. Aware of patterns, aware of trends. He's efficient... and a prick."

"This is Bo's Right Brain. Subjective, creative, sensory. Aware of feelings, aware of people. He's emotional... and an idiot."

That's your opinion, just- careful with opinions.

"Okay boys. Play nice."

I am the Left Brain
I am the Left Brain
I work really hard 'til my inevitable death brain
You have a job to do
you better do it right and the right way, is with the Left Brain's might.

I like Oreo's and pussy
Yes! In that order!
And I cried for at least an hour after watching Toy Story 3
Woody!
I am the Right Brain
I have feelings
I'm a little all over the place
But I'm lustful and trustful and I'm looking for somebody to love
(and put my penis in)

Here comes a female
Here comes a female
Puff your chest out
Take your phone
And check your email
Our evolutionary purpose is repopulate
So gather data now and see if she's a possible mate

Holy Fuck!
I think she might be the one!
There's something bout her!
I just can't describe it!

Tits

I am the earth
She's the glorious sun
I want her to trust me
And I just want her to-
How do I say this?
Sit on my face! Sit! Sit on- my face!

Alright now Right Brain
You're being insane

No, Left Brain
I'm just being alive
You should try it
You might like it

I worked hard to give him everything he cared about
You were worried 'bout the things that he was scared about
I am calm and collected when you act wild
I am the adult
You are the child

You think you're the right one every time!
You think you know everything
But you don't know anything, at all!
Half of his problems were supposed to be mine!
But you wanted everything
I hope that you're happy
'Cause he's sure not...

Well, according to my calculation, I'm sorry, let me run the numbers again. Um, you're a pussy.

Name calling? Really? We're gonna do name calling now?

I'm not calling names, I'm just stating facts. And the fact is that you are a quivering pussy.

I'm the pussy? Well at least I don't play with toys still, okay?

Rubik's Cubes are not toys. They keep my spacial reasoning skills- sharp.

Left Brain plays with toys. Look at you, Mister- you're a... toy player.

Well at least I did my fucking job, alright?I kept him working, I kept him productive! You were supposed to look after him! You were supposed to keep him emotionally stable for all this, now you're trying to blame me for how he's feeling? How he's feeling, if he's feeling unhappy is because you failed him! You did this to him! He hates you! I know he does! He fucking hates you!

*cries*

Right Brain, Right Brain look I'm sorry okay?...

*sobs* No you're not!

Look
Maybe there's something that we can do
Together

Together?

Take the best parts of both of us
Put them together

I'm listening...

It would let you get your feeling out
It would let me analyze
So you can man the themes
I'll man the form
It's something that George Carlin did
It's something that Steve Martin did
It's something special that we could both perform
Do you know what it is?

Juggling! We can juggle, and juggle our cares away!

It was comedy, we can do- comedy together.

"Initiate reassembly."

Alright, Right Brain, look comedy were gonna do comedy together, alright? We gotta do comedy!

Alright Left Brain, I'll do comedy with you!

Look, we can fix him. We can make him happy again, I promise, alright?

"5..." Left Brain, "4..." Left Brain, I love you.

"3... 2... 1..."

I know.

"Experimentation Complete."


Lyrics submitted by AbbyZitro

Left Brain, Right Brain song meanings
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