I was playing Xbox with a couple of friends
When my mom called and said "grandma's dying again"
I told her, "that sucks," and to say I said hi,
Mom yelled at me and told me that I had to drop by.
So off to the nursing home we drove in my car,
There were sleeping dudes in wheelchairs all over the yard
And inside the halls were scary and creepily lit,
It smelled like someone took a dump and then rotisseried it.

Then I found granny's room and I went inside,
"Good to see you," she said,
"You too," I lied
Then she started talking 'bout the stuff she ate this week.
I stuck my friends with her and went to take a leak.
Peed all I could pee till I could pee no more
So bored I opened up one of her cabinet drawers.
"Oh my God!" I shouted as I burst back in,
"Gran's got a prescription to Oxycontin??"

Let's go to the old folks home!
We can get doped up and then all get stoned!
Let's go to the old folks home
I'd a been there more if only I'd known!

Let's go to the old folks home!
We can get doped up and then all get stoned!
Let's go to the old folks home
I'd a been here more if only I'd known!

Old man Bernie likes to talk about the Korean war
And if you use all of his Percodan he just gets more
And Miss Edna doesn't care for the blacks a lot,
But she's got glaucoma so she gets good pot.
Gladys here only has diabetes,
So the best you're gonna find is Tylenol-3's
But Carl is my man he's got like AIDS in his brain
And I swear to God the dude can even get cocaine.

So we rip a couple lines,
Put on some records,
Bitch about kids and talk 'bout the weather.
Steve craps his pants, we all leave the room,
We pass out, take naps and nurses bring food.

Day after day as time goes on by,
Some people don't make it, we get sad and cry,
But new people move in and we all make friends,
With new stories, points of view and prescriptions.
I guess the point is that the elderly are people too
And you never know how long they're gonna be with you,
But they're sweet and they're lonely and they still need friends,
So be a good kid and go and visit them.

Let's go to the old folks home!
We can get doped up and then all get stoned!
Let's go to the old folks home
I'd a been there more if only I'd known!

Let's go to the old folks home!
We can get doped up and then all get stoned!
Let's go to the old folks home
I'd a been here more if only I'd known!



Lyrics submitted by Silverdew

Old Folks Home song meanings
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