This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Some nights, I stay up cashing in my bad luck
Some nights, I call it a draw
Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights, I wish they'd just fall off
But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure, what I stand for oh oh oh
What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for?
Most nights, I don't know anymore
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh
This is it, boys, this is war, what are we waiting for?
Why don't we break the rules already?
I was never one to believe the hype,
Save that for the black and white I try twice as hard and I'm half as liked,
But here they come again to jack my style
That's alright, I found a martyr in my bed tonight
Stops my bones from wondering just who I, who I, who I am, oh who am I, mm, mm
Well some nights, I wish that this all would end
'Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I'm scared you'll forget me again
Some nights, I always win, I always win
But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for, oh
What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know (come on)
So this is it? I sold my soul for this?
Washed my hands of that for this?
I miss my mom and dad for this?
No. When I see stars, when I see stars, that's all they are
When I hear songs, they sound like a swan, so come on
Oh, come on, oh, come on, oh come on!
Well that is it, guys, that is all, five minutes in and I'm bored again
Ten years of this, I'm not sure if anybody understands
This one's not for the folks at home, I'm sorry to leave, mom, I had to go
Who the fuck wants to die alone all dried up in the desert sun?
My heart is breaking for my sister and the con that she called "love"
But when I look into my nephew's eyes,
Man you wouldn't believe, the most amazing things, that can come from,
Some terrible nights, ah (oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh)
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh
The other night, you wouldn't believe the dream I just had about you and me
I called you up, but we'd both agree
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance, oh
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance, oh
Some nights, I call it a draw
Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights, I wish they'd just fall off
But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure, what I stand for oh oh oh
What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for?
Most nights, I don't know anymore
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa oh oh
This is it, boys, this is war, what are we waiting for?
Why don't we break the rules already?
I was never one to believe the hype,
Save that for the black and white I try twice as hard and I'm half as liked,
But here they come again to jack my style
That's alright, I found a martyr in my bed tonight
Stops my bones from wondering just who I, who I, who I am, oh who am I, mm, mm
Well some nights, I wish that this all would end
'Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I'm scared you'll forget me again
Some nights, I always win, I always win
But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for, oh
What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know (come on)
So this is it? I sold my soul for this?
Washed my hands of that for this?
I miss my mom and dad for this?
No. When I see stars, when I see stars, that's all they are
When I hear songs, they sound like a swan, so come on
Oh, come on, oh, come on, oh come on!
Well that is it, guys, that is all, five minutes in and I'm bored again
Ten years of this, I'm not sure if anybody understands
This one's not for the folks at home, I'm sorry to leave, mom, I had to go
Who the fuck wants to die alone all dried up in the desert sun?
My heart is breaking for my sister and the con that she called "love"
But when I look into my nephew's eyes,
Man you wouldn't believe, the most amazing things, that can come from,
Some terrible nights, ah (oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh)
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh
Oh whoa, oh whoa, oh whoa, oh oh
The other night, you wouldn't believe the dream I just had about you and me
I called you up, but we'd both agree
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance, oh
It's for the best you didn't listen
It's for the best we get our distance, oh
Lyrics submitted by tauntingthepavement, edited by Mellow_Harsher, daltdog, rtoompuu, lyricedit, Jessie8340, Montrose, deidra7, lcmayzl, JMSmusic, thenewval, jbird233, DBAPaul, sohostar, CheesyNach0
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Page
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I mostly agree with @gwright2. Here is what I would like to add/change
first stanza: I think he wishes his singing could bring him $$$. He wants the american dream! But at the same time he doesnt want all the exposure that comes with being famous.
second: I think he is conflicted. He liked being an unheard of band. Life was simpler, maybe even more fun? At the same time he has these amazing new fans who adore him and also has this new cash flow. Maybe he never really wanted to be famous but now that he is he doesnt know anymore.
third: He wants people to break social norms - a.k.a stop worshiping famous people. He hates the paparazzi and all that exposure. He never bought into all of that celeb bs (TMZ, National Enquirer, etc.) and doesnt think people should do the same to him now that he is one. Also, when your famous, no matter how hard you work at your music there are still going to be haters who call you a fake, say all you care about is the money, etc. These haters are bringing him down, making him feel like all is hard work is for nothing.
fourth: I am not sure about this part. Maybe he found someone who understands what he is going through? maybe he found out that being famous has its "perks" (lots of girls wanting to get in your pants!) I dont know.
fifth: When famous, it is hard to distinguish between a true friend and someone who is just using you. He want to be a nobody again because then he would have true friends again.
sixth: Still conflicted. I dont know what the ghost is referencing. Maybe himself before he was famous?
7th: He took a huge gamble in life and it ended up working... he is famous! But its not as grand as he thought. He questions if he should of made such a sacrifice just to be famous.
8th: When he sees stars (celebs) he just sees them as regular human beings and thats how they should be treated.
9th: He is alluding to the 15 minutes of fame and he is already 5 min in. He is past the OMFG IM FAMOUS faze and he is bored with it. He is sorry he ever left (for california? or wherever he is doing his music). He misses his mom and dad. He want to go back to them and everything be like it used to. But to do that he has to give up what he loves, singing. To him that would be as bad as dying in the desert alone maybe? (that might be a stretch...)
10th: He realizes good things can come from bad decisions. His sister had a night she probably would like to forget with a guy she thought she loved but now she has a beautiful son which the lead singer is glad to have him in his life.
11th: Maybe he had someone special in his life before he got famous. Now that he is famous he made some bad decisions and it cost him the love of his life. If he never was famous, he would not of made those mistakes (maybe he couldnt resist all the ladies flinging themselves at him? or he let the fame get to him and left her in the dust). This might be another reason why he is conflicted. He might of had a dream about the life they could of had. They realize whats done is done, no dream will ever change that.
10th:
10th: Actually, that interpretation is quite wrong.<br /> <br /> Nate's heart was breaking for his sister because she went through a terrible divorce. And though she was "conned" into thinking her husband was a wonderful guy. She still got an amazing little boy out of the marriage. Hence why he wrote, "Man you wouldn't believe the most amazing things, can come from some terrible lies."
9th: Actually, I think the "desert sun" part is literally referring to Arizona because Nate grew up here in the Phoenix area (Glendale-ish, more specifically, I believe).
I'm pretty sure the part about dying in the desert is reference to Arizona where he was born and grew up. He's saying that no one wants to die alone in a "no-name" place without leaving a name for themselves
whoops, didnt realize someone already posted that:)
This is the best meaning given. All of the explanations fit, except for the divorce correct above.