Punk's been dumbed down to just another form of TV
Marketed to shoppers spoonfed cartoon rebellion like sheep
Flock to worship any old school band
Who cares if they still care or if they're bad
Something new in town who wants to know?
And look at all the whores reunions for wrong reasons
Playing only songs from the good old days
About how bad the good old days were
So why not us? We don't even like this stuff no more
But look at all that retro-racket cash
Those dumb punk kids will buy anything

We'll sue the guy who wrote the songs
So we can sell them into commercials
Steal the name and hit the road trashing all our band stood for
We won't rehearse, sound worse
Dig up some old child star Who never learns the words
Hey, we're back Show us how much you care
The merch booth's right over there

And if our scam works What a bandwagon it will be
Malcolm in the Middle in the Misfits or Mary Kate and Ashley
Gary Coleman in Black Flag Courtney in Nirvana at last
And Emmanuel Lewis back in action singing for the Germs
When will it end? When people see this for what it is
Rock and Roll Swindle Pistols backed a thief
So how bout Kenny Boy Lay In Dead Kennedys
Because those dumb punk kids will buy anything


Lyrics submitted by sepultura1987

Those Dumb Punk Kids (Will Buy Anything) song meanings
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    Song Meaning"Those Dumb Punk Kids (Will Buy Anything)" is a song by Jello Biafra and The Melvins. It appears on their second album Sieg Howdy and was composed by Biafra and Melvins guitarist Buzz Osborne.
    The main target of the song is Biafra's former band Dead Kennedys, who sued Biafra in 1998 in order to gain control of the band's master tapes. (See the entries for both Mr. Biafra and Dead Kennedys for details on the case.) The song title derives from a quote by Dead Kennedys guitarist East Bay Ray that Biafra has been recalling in recent spoken word performances: "(He) always used to say that our own fans were so dumb that they'd buy anything, and that 'nobody believes that political shit anymore'." [1]
    In the lyrics, Biafra blasts his former bandmates for being greedy, for tainting what the band stood for by doing a reunion tour "for all the wrong reasons", only "playing hits from the good old days/About how bad the good old days were" (a lyric borrowed from Biafra's 1993 song "Buy My Snake Oil"), performing live without any rehearsal, and having "a former child star" (referring to Brandon Cruz) "who doesn't even know the words" taking Biafra's place.
    Semi-facetiously, Biafra claims that this "new" Dead Kennedys lineup could start a precedent where other former child stars take the place of original lead vocalists in classic punk bands, hypothesizing that Frankie Muniz would front The Misfits, Black Flag's new frontman would be Gary Coleman, and that The Germs would return with Emmanuel Lewis substituting for Darby Crash (The Germs recently reunited with actor Shane West, who portrays Crash in What We Do Is Secret, as lead singer). Biafra also fears that, using the same precedent, Courtney Love would lead her late husband Kurt Cobain's band Nirvana "at last".
    The song concludes by referring to the Sex Pistols' infamous collaboration with Great Train Robber Ronnie Biggs, suggesting that with that precedent in mind, Enron's Ken Lay could be the next lead singer of Dead Kennedys (although on the record, Biafra substitutes Martha Stewart's name instead, even though Stewart had not embezzled from her own company as Lay did with Enron.)
    The song was recorded during the sessions for Never Breathe What You Can't See, but could not be released until after the Biafra vs. Dead Kennedys trial had been concluded.
    sepultura1987on January 22, 2012   Link

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