This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
smeared up smudged up messed up makeup
against the window where my head lays
stay up all night counting laughing
shadows stealing all my days
smashed up crashed up lips all trashed up
breath one second more delayed
stealthy sneaking bedsprings creaking
thoroughbred...
cinematic overdrive systematic diatribe
iron bonds are brought to boil
stolen jewel for which i toil
a silhouette of cellophane
sacred things become profane
the instant that i touch them to my lips
scraping scratching nightmare thrashing
slipping out of sweating skin
blaming flaming sins i'm saving
waiting for the carnival
gleeful sadness suck out gladness
sing a song of joyous lovers
torn in two and born to madness
pinions clipped dead cherub covers
of untold sweetness she does taste
my hand longs to caress her face
crumpled crinkled acetate
glass spiderweb a twist of fate
wet ruby necklace ear to ear
while dead men scream things we can't hear
run your body past my finger tips
scraping scratching nightmare thrashing
slipping out of sweating skin
blaming flaming sins i'm saving
waiting for the carnival
gleeful sadness suck out gladness
sing a song of joyous lovers
torn in two and born to madness
pinions clipped dead cherub covers
...
sing a song of joy & love
devils serenade god above
wedding dress of plastic wrap
undone matches treasure trap
tricked & sickened hardwire bone
taped-up bruises still are shown
...
i know it, i see you, the secret is out;
look in these eyes: i don't care
you're still the falling star
i've hung all of my wishes on
against the window where my head lays
stay up all night counting laughing
shadows stealing all my days
smashed up crashed up lips all trashed up
breath one second more delayed
stealthy sneaking bedsprings creaking
thoroughbred...
cinematic overdrive systematic diatribe
iron bonds are brought to boil
stolen jewel for which i toil
a silhouette of cellophane
sacred things become profane
the instant that i touch them to my lips
scraping scratching nightmare thrashing
slipping out of sweating skin
blaming flaming sins i'm saving
waiting for the carnival
gleeful sadness suck out gladness
sing a song of joyous lovers
torn in two and born to madness
pinions clipped dead cherub covers
of untold sweetness she does taste
my hand longs to caress her face
crumpled crinkled acetate
glass spiderweb a twist of fate
wet ruby necklace ear to ear
while dead men scream things we can't hear
run your body past my finger tips
scraping scratching nightmare thrashing
slipping out of sweating skin
blaming flaming sins i'm saving
waiting for the carnival
gleeful sadness suck out gladness
sing a song of joyous lovers
torn in two and born to madness
pinions clipped dead cherub covers
...
sing a song of joy & love
devils serenade god above
wedding dress of plastic wrap
undone matches treasure trap
tricked & sickened hardwire bone
taped-up bruises still are shown
...
i know it, i see you, the secret is out;
look in these eyes: i don't care
you're still the falling star
i've hung all of my wishes on
Lyrics submitted by japanjeff
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