This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Seems that
I have lost my head
Like the
World has stopped again
I am
Hanging by a thread
Rain is sunlight
I am swimming right through the desert
Daytime is night
I can see you without my flashlight
I'm obscurely
Occupied with talking to ceilings
And confused by
I'm confused by too many feelings
If I
Could bend space and time
Would you
Think of being mine?
Fantasizing
You have starred in all of my daydreams
Mesmerizing
To your credit, my armor's failing
Take it easy
On a heart with trouble inhaling
Take it easy
On me now 'cause I'm going crazy
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
An ice age catching fire
It's true
Codes of silence
Speak too loud in too many languages
Are screaming
Through these tunnels of revelation
Are you keeping
Secrets from a big cosmic being
It's too much to own alone
My heart's beating
Thinking you tapped into my radar
And you're reading
All my thoughts are taking this too far
Past a mood swing
This is more than doctored machining
This is more than us
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
And ice age catching fire
It's true
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
My glacier bursts the stars in two
I have lost my head
Like the
World has stopped again
I am
Hanging by a thread
Rain is sunlight
I am swimming right through the desert
Daytime is night
I can see you without my flashlight
I'm obscurely
Occupied with talking to ceilings
And confused by
I'm confused by too many feelings
If I
Could bend space and time
Would you
Think of being mine?
Fantasizing
You have starred in all of my daydreams
Mesmerizing
To your credit, my armor's failing
Take it easy
On a heart with trouble inhaling
Take it easy
On me now 'cause I'm going crazy
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
An ice age catching fire
It's true
Codes of silence
Speak too loud in too many languages
Are screaming
Through these tunnels of revelation
Are you keeping
Secrets from a big cosmic being
It's too much to own alone
My heart's beating
Thinking you tapped into my radar
And you're reading
All my thoughts are taking this too far
Past a mood swing
This is more than doctored machining
This is more than us
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
And ice age catching fire
It's true
Is this called desire?
Is this called desire?
My glacier bursts the stars in two
Lyrics submitted by cristinaish
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To me, this song is about love unrequited, desire unfulfilled. It will never be fulfilled. I was in love with my best friend my junior year, and even though he was dating someone else, I always thought there was something more that went unsaid between me and him. I might have been fooling myself, but I still to this day don't think our friendship was totally platonic. That's why I related to the words, "codes of silence speak too loud in too many languages."
Unfortunately, the girl he was dating was one of my friends, making him totally off-limits. I tried so hard to stop thinking about him the way I did, but I couldn't. I fell hard for him and I couldn't reverse those feelings. I thought maybe in a different life we would have been together. "If I could bend space and time, would you think of being mine?"
And of course, he made my heart beat faster just sitting next to me. He used to sit close to me while we did homework, seemingly without thinking anything of it, and I would be sitting next to him, going crazy and trying to hide it. He was my weakness, so the most fitting lyrics for me were, "...You have starred in all of my daydreams. Mesmerizing, to your credit my armour's failing. Take it easy on a heart with trouble inhaling. Take it easy on my now cause I'm going crazy."
When I first heard this song, it was during that time of my life, and I connected with it because of him. He and I will never be together. I know that. We're attending college in different states and he lives 2000 miles away. But this song will always bring me back to those memories. It's a song of deep longing and confusion. It's about your world being turned upside down by someone you can't have. It's about falling for someone right when you thought you had your heart under control ("an ice age catching fire"), and being surprised at how intensely you can want someone. Charlotte Martin captures that feeling perfectly in this poetic, beautiful song.