Used to be in a gang
Til I beat a kid half dead
In a video arcade
Judge gave me a choice: jail or the Marines
Best time I ever had was being an MP

I wish I was down in El Salvador
Where I could jerk off with my gun
And kill the poor

More gang busts after I'm discharged
Got on offer frome police
Surprise, we'll wipe your record clean
If you'll become one of us

You've got just the skills we need
For the government's official gang
Robothug Riot Squad
Already I want more

I wish I was down in El Salvador
We're just countin' days
'Til we can do it up here

Well, Officer Friendly
What does Elmer the Safety Elephant
Have to say about this?
Well, good buddy
I''ll bet he says you can't do this!
Or this!
Or this!
Or even this!

His toy gun looked real
I had to defend myself
I'm always lookin' for excuses
To defend myself

People are storming out into the streets
People are poouring out into the streets
They hate me, they hate me

I just might have to defend myself

It's party time...

I look at you and smolder
With my nightstick and my shield
Little kids throw rocks at me
Their moms call me a pig

Commander says I gotta hold the line
'Til the TV cameras leave
Then we'll fire away, make my day
Just like good ol' Kent State

Why wait?
It'll be like I was down in El Salvador
Gonna jerk off with my gun
and kill the poor
Be a big man with my gun
And kill the poor

Jerk off with my gun
I think I'm gonna cum
Then I'll kiss my gun good night
And put her under my pillow

Lyrics submitted by punkpirate

I Wish I Was In El Salvador song meanings
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