"Art Snob Solutions" as written by and Kevin Barnes....
What's up directors? Grab your knives!
It's time to take all all of the lives
Of the people who cannot see the somnolent genius of Tarkovsky

Come on authors grab your guns!
It's time to murder everyone who has never heard of Apollinaire
Send them all to hell it's only fair

Cast them all into the flames if they don't know any names
Of the principles of Arte Povera
Or are unfamiliar with le serpent mascara
That's right mascara snake!!!

Come on painters alive or dead
Give all the cretins a boot to the head
If they don't extoll convincingly
Tempered Elan era Kandinsky

Throw them all into a well if they cannot tell
An Arto Parv feast of repitition from a Schoenburg 12 tone composition

Come on artists the day is here
And your mission is very clear
Put an end to the bourgoussie
And death to everyone who's never heard of me


Lyrics submitted by constant

"Art Snob Solutions" as written by

Lyrics © BUG MUSIC OBO APOLLINAIRE RAVE

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Art Snob Solutions song meanings
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48 Comments

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  • +3
    General Commenti think it's kind of ironic that this song is about how pointlessly pretentious art snobs are, yet here we all are being pretentious art snobs more-or-less bragging about which artists in the song we already knew beforehand or can correctly spell or reference.

    that said, i'm the same way and found myself bragging (in my head) about how i knew all of them except that damn serpent mascara... :/ oh well, i guess that's of montreal's target audience... intelligent people.
    jawamachineson July 03, 2006   Link
  • +2
    General CommentToday I was leaning against the fridge in the bakery I work in, and I looked at my hand, and I was like, damn. I can make this hand move whenever I want it to. And to prove it, I made a circle in the air. And then I noticed that I was breathing, and realized that the air was being converted to carbon dioxide in my lungs. And I thought damn, I'm doing that. And I sat like that for a good two minutes, just breathing, just moving my left hand. And I thought to myself, damn, I'm alive.
    verbosityon March 20, 2008   Link
  • +1
    General CommentI think it's hilarious.
    mynameisntanaon January 18, 2006   Link
  • +1
    General CommentTarkovsky was a Russian director.
    verbeson March 08, 2006   Link
  • +1
    General CommentI joined this site just for this one thing:
    For people who pride themselves so highly on knowing about songs and Kandinsky, I am shcoked that ALL OF YOU were mystified by the mascara snake (or properly, Mascara Snake). This is an obvious reference, copied VERBATIM, to Captain Beefheart and The Magic Band member The Mascara Snake (Vliet's cousin from the Trout Mask Replica band). It took over 10 months for this easy as hell reference to finally be explained to supposed art lovers here. Jeez....
    Frunobulax19on January 09, 2007   Link
  • +1
    General Commenti think that he put "arto parv" just to see if actual art snobs would notice, and to piss off the ones who got it... i think its bloody brilliant satire. magnificat is an excellant part piece, if you get a chance
    Phyrgianhalfcadenceon January 18, 2007   Link
  • +1
    General Commentall of those people here who are berating those discussing all of the references in this song really need to cool it a bit. I mean, that's why i came here...because the lyrics made me curious and i wanted to know what exactly was referenced in the song. This wouldn't be very effective if nobody would admit to knowing the reference. and there was only like, one post here that i thought sounded conceited. so c'mon.
    snethamonon August 14, 2007   Link
  • +1
    General CommentAlso, I just recently realized they're saying "Boot to the head"
    can anyone agree with me that they're referencing The Frantics' sketch of the same name?
    laurelmon October 05, 2008   Link
  • +1
    General CommentI've always been confused by the "Arto Parv feast of repetition". There is an Estonian composer named Arvo Part (Pärt in the original language) who makes repetitive music, sometimes based on other classical composers.

    I think the Arto Parv part actually is supposed to be about him, but was misspelled and mispronounced.

    So, maybe no so art snobby after all...
    Matsebondon March 01, 2015   Link
  • +1
    General CommentSo we all know the filmmaker Tarkovsky, the poet Apollinaire, the art movement Arte Povera, the painter Kandinsky and the composers Pärt and Schoenberg. But what the hell is Le Serpent Mascara?! Ok, after googling, now I know. Before, I must admit, I had no clue. I'm only an 86% art snob.
    Matsebondon January 26, 2016   Link

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