"Disintegrating" as written by and J. Jorgenson....
Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.
This halfway house is home to a madman.
His ghosts, and his perfect song.
This year has been bruised and broken in so many ways that days have long since been abolished.

But If all of this could bring my love back to me...
I'd do away with the drugs and the drink...and the body count could cease.
I've sensed her here, but I know that we're destined to stay seperated.
...and this is all my fault.
For what it's worth.
It's worsening, and my song demands an ending...closure.
Karma can't control the beast.
I've born to swallow us whole.
Yes, my heart may beat again - but we all need medicine.
So forgive me, love, I'm choosing a fitting end to the abusing.
Last night, I leapt through the ceiling.
There was just something appealing about leaving my body behind and coming through as you circled overhead.
I said all the things that had been missing from the funeral that I had been forbidden from taking any part in.
You forgave me for everything while the victims of the song sounded their applause.
"The doctor has to go." was the last thing that you said as I found my body back in bed
...but then, i guess it's always been his job to fix this.


Lyrics submitted by BrandNew1208

"Disintegrating" as written by

Lyrics © BUG MUSIC O/B/O JORGENSONGS MUSIC

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Disintegrating song meanings
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8 Comments

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  • +1
    General Commentabandon all hope
    ye who enter here
    this halfway house is home to a madman
    his ghost, his perfect song is here
    has been bruised and broken so many ways
    that day has long since been abolished
    but if all this could bring my love back to me
    I'd do away with the drugs and the drinking
    the body count could cease i sense her here
    i know that were destined to stay separated
    and this is all my fault, with a twisted neck
    and my song remains an ending
    closure come, I can't control
    the beast that's born to swallow us all
    and yes, my heart may beat again
    but we all need medicine
    so forgive me love for choosing
    a fitting end to the abusing

    last night I leaped through the ceiling
    there's just something appealing about leaving my
    body behind and coming through as you
    circled overhead and I said all the things
    that had been missing from the funeral that i'd been forbidden
    from taking any part in and you forgave me for everything
    while the victims of the song sounded their applause

    doctor has to go

    it was the last thing that you said,
    as I found my body back in bed
    but then I guess its always been his job to fix this

    and this is all my fault, with a twisted neck
    and my song remains an ending
    closure come, I can't control
    the beast that's born to swallow us all
    and yes, my heart may beat again
    but we all need medicine
    so forgive me love for choosing
    a fitting end to the abusing
    horrible22on July 21, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Commentstarts out...its all about the song in my head, the one where the audience is all dead
    jbo523on July 06, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Commentmy fault...i was thinking about the wrong song(composing) sorry
    jbo523on July 06, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Commentim not sure but it kind of sounds like hes saying "the wires wore the twisted neck".
    Halberstramon July 09, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General CommentThis is a concept album. Which means that the entire album tells a story. Each song is a different installment in the story of the nameless patient. Somtimes the perspective is switched from the patient to the doctor to the deceased wife. My interpretation of the story goes as follows.

    Introducing - The doctor is talking about how he has released the patient from the hospital again, indicating it's not the first time he's been released. The patient was hospitalized because he suffered from violent horrible nightmares and killed his wife whom he loved very much in his sleep. The patient is catatonic, which is just a state of non-responsivness, almost.

    Dreaming - This song is about the night that the Patient kills his wife. He suffocates her while having a nightmare.

    Waking - The Patient wakes up to realise what he's done. He calls the police and turns himself in and he is waiting for the ambulance. He can't believe what he's done, he wants to take it back. He covers the house with her perfume.

    Sentencing - The judge and the doctors decide whether to charge him with murder and send him to jail or decalre him mentaly instable and send him to the hospital. The doctor thinks he shoudl be hospitalized.

    Medicating - The Patient is in the hospital and tries to convince the doctor to release him. He wants to go back to his life and he thinks that the hospital is just making him worse. The doctor agrees and releases him from the hospital.

    Purging - The Patient hsa been released and is returning into society. Everyone is shocked at his quick return into society/work considering what he did. The guilt becomes overpowering inside of him and he cuts off his hands so he won't ever kill again.

    Relapsing - The Patient is back in the hospital after cutting off his hands and he begins to hear his wife's voice in his head. He begins trying to fill his emptiness by writing a song inside his head.

    Recovering - The Patient is on medication since he is catatonic and he is also obviously on painkillers due to his lack of hands. He begins taking more pills than necessary and all he can hear is the song inside of his head. He takes more and more pills to keep the song playing.

    Composing - The Patient convinces the doctor he's getting better and requests to see his friends and family because he thinks it'll help him recover. He has everyone over for dinner and poisons them all, killing them. He is "composing" his song by killing people and he thinks that he can see his wife. The song in his head keeps her alive in his mind.

    Disintegrating - The Patient is completely isolated with the song inside his head. He is abusing alcohol and drugs and in a state between the living and dead. He's thinking of everyone he's killed and needs a finale to his song.

    Healing - The Patient has called the doctor and he feels the song in his head coming to an end. By this time he's barely even alive and he has made a choice to get better, that's why he called the doctor. He is waiting for the doctor to arrive and take him to the hospital. The song in his head is what is keeping him alive.

    Dying - The Doctor finally arrives for the Patient and finds him close to death lying in his apartment. He can smell the odour of the bodies that are most likely still in the apartment and he can smell a woman's perfume, the Patient's wife's perfume. The Patient knows he is dying and he knows what he did. He is finally responding and I think he is happy he is dying cause he will be with his wife. He is looking back at everythign that happened and he is just giving up on the song and on living.



    Of course this is all just my interpretation who knows if I'm even close. Hahah oh well let me know what you think.
    wishfulthinking167on December 05, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General CommentHEY IT'S THIS WAY!
    "this halfway house is home to a madman, his ghosts, & his perfect song. this year has been bruised & broken in so many ways that days have long since been abolished."
    jinx_me6on June 25, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Commentthe chorus SHOULD be

    For what its worth its worsening
    and my song demands an ending closure
    that I can't control
    the beast that's born to swallow us all
    and yes, my heart may beat again
    but we all need medicine
    so forgive me love for choosing
    a fitting end to the abusing
    j0hn0bon December 10, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General CommentAlso in this song I think he's accepting that he's going to die soon as well because he is so weak and sick.
    .Three.Lefts.on July 05, 2007   Link

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