I'll tell you once
I'll tell you twice
You better wise up Janet Weiss
Your apple pie don't taste too nice
You better wise up Janet Weiss

I've laid the seed
It should be all you need
You're as sensual as a pencil
Wound up like an E or first string
When we made it did you hear a bell ring?

You got a block
Well take my advice
You better wise up Janet Weiss
The transducer
Will seduce ya
It's something you'll get used to
A mental mind-fuck can be nice

Janet: My feet! I can't move my feet!

Dr Scott: My wheels! My god, I can't move my wheels!

Brad: It's almost as if we're glued to the spot!

Frank: You are, so quake with fear you tiny fools!

Janet: We're trapped!
Dr Scott: You won't find earth people quite the easy mark you imagine. This sonic transducer, is I suppose, some kind of audio-vibratory, physio-molecular transport device

Brad: You mean...

Dr Scott: Yes, brad. It's something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time, but it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it. A device which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space, and who knows, perhaps even time itself!

Janet: You mean he's gonna send us to another planet?

Frank: Planet schmanet Janet
You better wise up Janet Weiss
Build your thighs up
You better wise up

Narrator: And then she cries out
Janet: STOP!

Lyrics submitted by warped1_02

Planet Schmanet Janet song meanings
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  • 0
    General Commentmissed out lyrics here (the whole "don't get hot and blustered" etc)
    liza-bethon May 17, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General CommentUSE- A- BIT- OF- MUUUUSTARRD!
    RiffRaffon June 15, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Comment"You're a hot dog! But you better not try to hurt her, FrankFURTER!"
    (does awkward double-punch to the air)
    precipitateon November 01, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Commenthahaha this song is so awesome and catchy. and tim curry is forever effin' sexy in this film.
    "you're a sensual as a pencil"... hahaha. :P
    meg;on July 02, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General CommentSome of the lyrics are wronggg...

    Frank: Planet schmanet Janet
    You better wise up Janet Weiss
    You'd better wise up: << (this line is missing on the lyrics here?!)
    Build your thighs up
    You better wise up

    No.1 fan x Jade
    jadehintonon April 13, 2009   Link

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