"This Grudge" as written by and Alanis Morissette....
Fourteen years
Thirty minutes
Fifteen seconds I've
Held this grudge

Eleven songs
Four full journals
Thoughts of punishment
I've expended

Not in contact
Not a letter
Such communication
You've been vilified
Used as fodder
You deserve a piece
Of every record

But who's it hurting now?
Who's the one that's stuck?
Who's it torturing now
With an antique knot in her stomach?

I want to be big and let go
Of this grudge that's grown old
All this time I've not known
How to rest this bygone
I want to be soft and resolved
Clean of slate and released
I want to forgive for the both of us

Like an abandoned house
Dusty covered
Still intact
If I visit it now
Will I simply re-live it
Somehow gratuitous

But who's still aching now?
Who's tired of her own voice?
Who is it weighing down
With no gift from time of said healing


Maybe as I cut the cord
Veils will lift from my eyes
Maybe as I lay this to rest
Dead weight off my shoulders will rise

Here I sit
Much determined
Ever ill-equipped
To draw this curtain
How this has entertained
And has served me well
Ever the victim

But who's done whining now?
Who's ready to put down
This load I've carried longer than I had cared to remember


Lyrics submitted by geekusa

"This Grudge" as written by Alanis Morissette

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group

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This Grudge song meanings
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  • +1
    General CommentI pity alanis so much for having had to make such an expierience in her life. If there is something I DO know than it is that writing this song was just another senseless and good meant try to forget the love of her life. she will never manage this totally, it is impossible. i think i know so many more alanis songs, that talk about just the same man. he is the one and she will never ever let him go.
    sarion March 05, 2005   Link
  • +1
    General CommentThis song means a lot to me coz I can really realet to it - there will always be the one that I don't love anymore but has hurt me more than I think anyone ever will again, maybe because of simply how vulnerable I was at the time, and who will stick with me in my thoughts every day, every week, for the rest of my life - he is the one I will always have this grudge for, and the one I will never forgive, and the one that despite how much I hate him, has taught me all I know in terms of knowing what I want strongly enough now to never let that happen to me again. Does anyone know, is this the same guy she refers to in Hands Clean and Right Through You? What man is it? Anyone know more about him?
    CakeAndSodomy69on August 19, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General CommentThis song is good. Its obivous what she is talking about... She is just ready to forgive a past love for what they did to her, after so many years of just not letting go, even if he isn't willin to.
    suhaon December 12, 2004   Link
  • 0
    General CommentI know nobody is going to believe this - but the ill-fated relationship she is talking about here happened when she was 14 years old - with an older man - and it was DAVE COULIER!! I swear! He is the reason for "You Outta Know" and "Flash Forward" and a ton of other songs. She was really young and he was 15 years older than her! They met during her days on "You Can't Do That on Television" and it turned into an affair. Gives new meaning to the phrase "Cut - IT -OUT"
    meghanlon April 23, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General CommentActually "I meant the song "Hands Clean" in the above post - for some reason I thought it was called Flash Forward.
    meghanlon April 23, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Commentsuch bull meghanl. unless "You can't do that on television" was filmed in Ottawa, ON.
    She went to glebe highschool
    and lived a few blocks from me.
    I know some of her old teachers,
    and she used to babysit a bunch of my good friends when i was younger.
    ohhungryoherikaon July 23, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General CommentI don't think this has anything at all to do with hands clean and/or you ougtha know. Hands clean was not nearly as traumatic, and I don't think the "14 years" has something to do with her age. It's the amount of time the grudge has been alive. Also I don't get the impression that Alanis regrets that relationship, or that she was hurt so violently as this song implies. Hands Clean sounded so happy - like a good memory. This Grudge clearly isn't a very good memory.
    And You Ougtha Know? No, really, not... this song expresses regret, not anger. It's different feelings and although it's possible they all could apply to one relationship that would just seem wrong to me, and wrong if you listen to the feelings the songs evoke.
    Human-beefon August 10, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General CommentThis grudge has been the source of her rage or bitterness in the past, and she is finally letting it rest. This is powerful, as she looks within herself to forgive the actions another person.
    abey85on August 16, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Commentperhaps it's about a parent? maybe??
    SpeakOutloud16on October 29, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Commentoh for crying out loud it doesn't matter, everyone has had someone they feel like that about. it's about letting go of your grudge because it's hurting you more than it hurts the one who caused it. and it's probably related to Hands Clean because when she says "I want to forgive the both of us" even when you think that it's the other person's fault but she blames herself too abou being naive or gullible
    kamaryaon July 12, 2008   Link

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