P.I.N.T

I dunno what you heard about me,
But you aint gettin a smirnoff for free.
You can sit yourself on my knee,
But keep your hands off my P.I.N.T

Now sharon, shes in the pub shes pullin the pints
And pullin the punters if she thinks the price is right
Shes into nuts and gin with slim line tonic
She plucked out her eyebrow n drew a line on it
I don’t buy her a drink, I just get her some pork scratchins
Keep her off my pint cos I think her warts catchin (urgh)
It's pub quiz night n its bad for my health
She asked me 21 questions and there all about herself
She likes my hair, she likes my car, shes in the daily sport
I don’t understand a single word because she comes from york
I'm not that bloke that’s only tryna get her into bed, (nope)
I'm that bloke that’s only tryin cos im off my head (yep)
We can leave now if your startin to get bored
We’ll take the bus home because my nova’s not insured
Look love its simple if your sittin with me
Sip your drink but don’t touch my P.I.N.T
(haha)

I dunno what you heard about me,
But you aint gettin a smirnoff for free.
You can sit yourself on my knee,
But keep your hands off my P.I.N.T

Bur-bur-bur-bur-burn unittttt! (hahaha)
F-i-f-t-y pence that’s me,
I work in the burn unit infirmary
NHS pention 'til im sixty three
And you no that im representin' kings Langley..
F-i-f-t-y pence thats me,
I'm a nature loving geezer you can find me in the tree,
I'm accidently known and locally accepted
Get off my pint!
So now you no about me
Yea love got my reebok classics on, (wee)
I'm 'bout to show you why my pint hand is quite strong
You're not wrong if you think I got a lazy eye,
It's 'cos I had a mishap with a steak 'n kidney pie (oops)
I down a pint the same way I down a glass of water (slurp)
I swear I didn’t know this bird was the landlords daughter
BURN, U, N-I-Tizzy,
I bumped my head and now im feelin dizzy
I've got people in Watford that no how I get down
Got a bird in Hemel,
A few mates in town,
I've got a job in Mcdonalds and i'm not messin around
I've got a Big Mac, Mcflurry’s and a quarter pound-er (haha)
Just put it on my tab,
Pick up a doner at millennium kebab, for closin time
And about the fighting
I've got a beer proof vest to avoid the pinting, pinting

I dunno what you heard about me,
But you aint gettin a smirnoff for free.
You can sit yourself on my knee,
But keep your hands off my P.I.N.T

Yeah
Now in Hollywood they say there's no business like show business,
Well in the pub dave said there's no business like the dough business...
And he’s a baker
See if I talk really fast I sound like a prat but if you listen real fast I don’t gotta slow down
Haha..
Yea..