"Christmas Crush" as written by and Adam Tyler Lohrbach....
"Had a crush on Santa
Since I was nine years old
But oh Santa, why do you go?
Once a year you come visit me
Eat my cookies, leave presents
The same old routine
But now Santa, I want something more
No presents are what this girl's asking for
Santa sleep with me tonight"

I read these words in her diary
An invasion of my girlfriend's privacy
I shouldnt have but I'm glad I did
I wonder what does she see in him?
A big old tub of jelly with a double-chin
He's older than my grandmother
Her feelings for him (?) are really bizzare
A sexual attraction for this holiday star
I've got a plan that you wouldn't believe
But I've gotta act fast, it's christmas eve
It's christmas eve, it's christmas eve

A Santa suit is what I will get
And give my girlfriend a night that she'll never forget
And neither will I
Went through my closet and found a red robe
Made a beard out of cotton, stuffed my shirt with pillows
And drove to my girl's house
I slid down the chimney and to my dismay
Saw santa and my girl in red lingerie
And inbetween all the moans and groans
I heard her say:

"Oh Santa, oh Santa"
She said "Santa I missed you I love you
I wish you would stay home forever with me
Santa I knew you were coming to town
But now you are cumming with me"
Santa, get off of my girlfriend
Get off of my girlfriend
Get off my girlfriend

Lyrics submitted by All_in_vain

Christmas Crush song meanings
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  • 0
    General Commentholy shit, that is wak!!omg that wood suck sum major ass if i did that to a guy!!!!!!!
    lilpunkrockeron September 28, 2002   Link
  • 0
    General Commenthahaha... this is so effin funny, it's sad.
    xinxwinterxon June 22, 2003   Link
  • 0
    General Commentthis song is funny shit!
    MrMoogleson June 29, 2003   Link
  • 0
    General CommentSome dudes girl friend has a fantasy about banging Santa Claus and makes it happen. "Santa I knew you were coming to town But now you are cumming with me" Lets hope santa doesn't make this skank pregnant. heh.
    Maxfioron December 18, 2005   Link

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