Oh, come back, proud Canadians
To before you had TV,
No hockey night in Canada,
There was no CBC (Oh, my God!).
In 1812, Madison was mad,
He was the president, you know
He thought he’d tell the British where they ought to go
He thought he’d invade Canada,
He thought that he was tough
Instead we went to Washington....
And burned down all his stuff!

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
And we’re the one’s that did it!
It burned, burned, burned,
While the president ran and cried.
It burned, burned, burned,
And things were very historical.
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

Us hillbillies from Kentucky,
Dressed in green and red,
Left home to fight in Canada,
But they returned home dead
It’s the only war the Yankees lost, except for Vietnam
And also the Alamo... and the Bay of... ham.
The loser was America,
The winner was ourselves,
So join right in and gloat about the War of 1812

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
And we’re the one’s that did it!
It burned, burned, burned,
While the president ran and cried.
It burned, burned, burned,
And things were very historical.
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

In 1812, we were just sittin’ around,
Mindin’ our own business, puttin’ crops into the ground.
We heard the soldiers coming and we didn’t like that sound.
So we took a boat to Washington and burned it to the ground.

Oh... we... fired our guns, but the Yankees kept-a coming,
There wasn’t quite as many as there was a while ago.
We fired once more and the Yankees started running,
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico, oh, oh....
They ran through the snow and they ran through the forest,
They ran through the bushes where the beavers wouldn’t go.
They ran so fast, they forgot to take their culture,
Back to America, and Gulf and Texaco

So, if you go to Washington, its buildings clean and nice,
Bring a pack of matches, and we’ll burn the White House twice!

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
But the Americans won’t admit it
It burned, burned, burned,
It burned and burned and burned
It burned, burned, burned,
Now, I bet that made them mad
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!


Lyrics submitted by Queen Vegeta

The War Of 1812 song meanings
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    General Comment

    Sounds like these Canadians did not like Johnny Horton's retelling of Southern resilience at the end of the War of 1812. The fact that the British navy (there was no autonomous country of Canada at the time), the most powerful in the world, raided our poor agrarian capital and set fire to a few buildings is nothing to be proud of. But hey, think of all the beavers we saved temporarily reducing Toronto to ashes.

    Now don't get me wrong, I enjoyed this song and Canada. CBC totally beats NPR, and the QEW is a lovely road to get stuck on during rush hour. However, let me tell you, I have never seen such an inferiority complex as with the people I met in Canada. Every other joke was about our dollar (not as strong as it was when I heard the jokes), and any reference to something American where its counterpart in Canada was noteably different always got a snotty rebuttal.

    Why am I rambling? I forget, but I love poutine (french fries with curdled cheese in some sort of brown gall stone sauce)....a Canadian staple.

    pinbackon August 06, 2005   Link

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