Mental Breakdowon

my feet are on the ceiling and my eyes are toward the floor this world is up side down and i just don't know what is to come anymore.

i am sick and tired of all of these god damned excuses, i am tired of my life, i am tired of you...

i am tired of now one understanding the way i feel anymore. i am ready to fuck it all over b/c i just can't find the door.

my heads spining. my legs are bending , and before we can realize it i m gonna be face down on the floor.

but don't worry it is quick it is painless. its a not like the hearache one suffers after his greatest loss.

don't hate a man for how he feels, b/c there is no explination but foolishness, but that just can't cutt it for ya..

so cutt him off at the knees. i put myself in your lasso. i didn't know you would kick the stool out from underneath the floor

my legs are kickin, my face is turning a rather pale blue. my eyes are open, the blood vessels are all turned a dark ruby red.

i came into this world, i walked the white line. straight as an arrow. i pleased the crowd. i thought i pleased myself.

i made my creator proud, but only he knows how much longer he will allow me to faulter... i am tired of slippin i am tired of crawling.

i felll. i wanna get up i want to make you smile fuck this world fuck everyone who told me they were gonna help me threw it.

i don't want em i don't want em, all i want is you, i want your appreciation, fuck your sypmathy, fuck the world, i all need is one person w/ a little bit, just a little bit of common understanding..

i fail myself when i look in the mirror, i am just a normal person. w/ some unnormal problems.. my greatest flaw is jealousy.

it will chew you up and spit you out. it will make you the lonliest man on the face of the earth, and it will motivate you to do the things you hate most.

my kryptonite is love, i don't know when to quit i don't know when to jump. i just can't jump off this ship. there is no where to run.

i am going down. i am the captian of this vessel. i hit the rock. i am going down. i don't know where the time went.

i don't know why it all had to change. my wants are the same...

all i want is you. all i want is your understandin and appreciation for the things that im goin threw...

i want to crawl into your arms and hide from the world. i want to secretly show you just a little bit of my determination.

i have the fuel i need the mother fuckin fire... but even if i had it. who knows.. i would still be walkin lifes little tight wire.

100 feet up. all eyes are on me.. don't slip it will give the others courage to make through it all. maybe giving others self satisfaction is my purpose.

if i lift the world up with my own self disastor. then fine. end it all but end it quick. lie to me lie to my face.

can yoube my friend can you make it cann you putt up with my punk ass ways my stupid little thoughts and manipulations.

just tell me yeah sure. slap a smile on your face. get out there and go throw the ball.

it hurts so much less... than the bluntness you posses.

"id on't even know you" that is yourfavorite line. no shit jo. i don't even know myself.

all i know is that...

all i want is you, all i want is your understandin and appreciation for the things that i am goin threw...

i know it is impossible. and this dream i pursue is hopeless. its undeserved and in the eyes of my once thought mirror.. simply a pursuasive plea

you speak so eliquently.. i wish you could be in my head. you wouldn't hate me . you would undertand. you wouldn't be pissed by petty mistakes.

and i f i could be in yours i wouldn't do them. b/c i love you and i don't ever want to hurt you..

but of all the people can't you seeee.e. that i just don't know what i am doing.. i am fucking up every sc. of everyday. everybody just the same..

i am sorry. i just don't knwo how to come clean. i lost my eggs in my one basket.

young lust.. steve knew it better than the rest. but it seems right now. that the only people that i can relate to are the people i know least..

rob , steve, and tp they all comfort me. but they just don't fit like you. write a song. i promise i ll sing it every day

pray a prayer. i promise i ll say it every day.. smile at me. i promise ill take it all in stride.

its' just all of these feelings aare cloudin up my reasoning... i wanna fix it all but i dont' knwo where to start....

i just fail with every new found attempt.. i can only manage to eat myself from the inside out.. that is why you are fading so fast.

you are my soul's neighbor you are my soul core's best friend. sorry we have a fire over here.

WE DON'T NEED NO WATER le t the mtoher fucker burn. burn mother fuckrer burn..

you odn't understand you made the common mistake , you gave me too muchh godd adnmed credit. you assumedi was aware of my actions.

don't youunderstand that other voic eyou hear. when i tel you to leave me alone what i am saying. is not me it is that virus insida a me...

i don't knwo what i can teel you to fi x i tall b/c i can't... you don' t even know me.

i wanted to see you so fucking bad.. but you can't see it.. you couldn't catch a baseball if i threw it at your head....

but hell i couldn't doge a big truck coming down a high way...

i want to see you. ofcourse id o. fuck her. don't be mislead by my past mistakes. i am soryry about my track record..

but don't jump, don't go . if this ship is going down .. cathc the las t raft. i m not going.

don't worry the last thing that will run through my mind won't be this petty mess. it will be the memories which are best.

ignorance is bliss. lie to me. telll me that it is all gonna be ok, that one day you will stay..i swear,, i think i can hear the angels cry...

this place we have found ourselves. is close to the edge.. i am hanging over telling you to let go.. my hands are open my body is ready to go..

cause i m not coming back.. i ll never get back to where i was..

you are holding on tight you just can't stand to see me hit the floor.

well jerk my lame ass up.. ask me what the fuck is wrong.. pull yourself together man... or else , come on your hold world is dying..

you never truley understand yourslef of the lies.. you simply try to forget them and menatlly set your own slate clean..

thanks to that i believe it is impossible for me and you to ever be truley happy. that is impossible my friend...

sorry this life is misery but we are destinged to live it too the fullest so they say..

i am tired of thinkin i am tired of making since of my actions.. i don't need an excuse i will plead anyting . i wish i couldhave you back.. you are gone lst to my own misfortune my fucked u p destiny.

i hope you feel your shoes.. mine are stuck in the mudd.. i was only a freshman..

all i needed was you, all i need was you understandin and appreciation for the things that i was goin threw...

i needed lots of things.. i didn't get. i got tons of things but in the end they all amounted to spit..

hell, its' all gonna end and it just might as well be no other, than my own god damned fault...

well it is late i n my game of life. i know i am lonley.. the rain is coming. i hope it washes me away..

i hope the memory fades like your past.. i hope the pain for you just don't last. cause for me it is a constant burning that i can't erase..

very simular to that smile you once had on your face...

heyyy its me i am screamin. for you.. please wake me up from my eveyr day night mare. put me back to sleep. i wanna go back to the places i love most...

right next to you..

but scratch that.. it just isn't good for you.

ignorance is bliss.. love is asking for failure..

baby,, all i fucking need is you.. alll you need is a life with out me..

i am so sorry you don't knwo where i am coming from i wish you did cause godd d damnit i wish that i could fix your tattered piecces. i want to sew you robe that i tore...

i am so sorryy.. youdon't even know who i am mmmmm...

tell you friends tell me shadows tell my father. ia m sorry.. i cracked, and split down the middle..

i couldn't last like you wanted me tooo. i couldn't make it liket hey told me. to i loved to much. and lost it all..

its my own damn fault.. but i wish you could understand just one percent of the way i feel. i f you did i swear god just take my word for it, although it is shit.. take my word for it you would have done it all . you too would have done the same...

i am sorry i can't shake this trance....

all i need is you. all i need is a little bit of understandin and appreciation fot the things that i m goin threw...

all i can't have is you.. all i can't have is a little bit of your understandin and apprecaition forr the things that im goin threw...

sorry i should have knew.. i still love you.

but not enough. it is my time now to let you go.. whew let me go too. i am just goin too low.

i will remember you when i hit the floor.. and when im there . i lll remind my self. and maybe i will forget that i can't have it....

b/c

god damnitttt

shit all i fucking want.....

all i want is you, all i want is you , all i want is you , all i want is you, all i wnat is you,,,, all i fucking want is you!!!! all i want is you....

and allitleunderstading and apprecation for the things that iam going threw...

but i know it is out of reach..

forgive me..

cause like i said it will never change. only the situation fades with time.. miss you much love you always.. just remember..

all i want it you. i will think that as i hit the floor..

you are the last thing that will run through my mind. you were.. i am gone...

tuesday had come and gone with the wind.. make a new wish on another rose. one that has petals. cause all i got is thorns..

all i want it you.

my world

my feet are on the ceiling and my eyes are toward the floor this world is up side down and i just don't know what is to come anymore.



all i want is you... .