This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
Leave me all alone
There ain’t nobody callin on my telephone
Because I ripped that bitch right up outta the wall
I apologize to any y’all that tried to call
I haven’t been myself lately
I been slowly losin’ my mind and tellin’ ‘em it’s Raybay(?)
I’m lookin’ hella shady and I haven’t showered in weeks
I haven’t washed my balls, I haven’t brushed my teeth
All I see is demons everywhere that I look
Was it the ouiji, the black magic warlock book?
I can’t remember…
But how can my memories leave me?
I can’t believe…
The spirits would try to deceive me
But they did…
Just like a little kid
I was so eager to learn, so willing to give
But all they did was hate me and break me
Use my body for a host and my mirror for the gateway
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’s is wrong with me
Will its last for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Please don’t walk away
I want you to hear what I gotta say
I never had anyone ever care for me
I never had anyone ever there for me
If you would listen to me instead of callin’ me names
I would explain why I’m shakin’ and I’m goin’ insane
My mind is on vacation, lack of conversation
I’m like a radio with static on every station
Still I wanna know will I be normal again?
You say it’s bullshit and tell me that it’s all pretend
But if it’s false…
Then why don’t the demons just disappear?
And if it’s untrue…
Then why am I seein’ ‘em crystal clear?
Because I do…
The mirror’s turnin’ blue
And soul after soul keeps walkin’ right through
They’re livin’ in my house and livin’ inside my head
Some sleep in the closet, others sleep under the bed
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’s is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
All I wanted to be
Was a member of a family with unity
But the people that’s alive will stab you straight in the back
And throw a stick in the spokes and flip you offa the track
If it wasn’t for Monoxide and Violent J
That nigga Jack, Shaggy 2 Dope and Blaze Ya Dead Homie
I probably woulda given up and callin’ it quits
I probably wouldn’t be here
I probably wouldn’t be shit
I find myself lookin’ back at the glass
And reminisce on the times of the present and past
I’m feelin’ strange…
I wonder if they can save me?
I’m feelin’ cold…
I’m standin’ in front of the gateway
Well here I am…
I’m such a crazy man
I’m tryin’ to control my life the best that I can
But the demons are around me tryin’ to stray me away
I thank god that I’m standin’ right here today
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
There ain’t nobody callin on my telephone
Because I ripped that bitch right up outta the wall
I apologize to any y’all that tried to call
I haven’t been myself lately
I been slowly losin’ my mind and tellin’ ‘em it’s Raybay(?)
I’m lookin’ hella shady and I haven’t showered in weeks
I haven’t washed my balls, I haven’t brushed my teeth
All I see is demons everywhere that I look
Was it the ouiji, the black magic warlock book?
I can’t remember…
But how can my memories leave me?
I can’t believe…
The spirits would try to deceive me
But they did…
Just like a little kid
I was so eager to learn, so willing to give
But all they did was hate me and break me
Use my body for a host and my mirror for the gateway
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’s is wrong with me
Will its last for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Please don’t walk away
I want you to hear what I gotta say
I never had anyone ever care for me
I never had anyone ever there for me
If you would listen to me instead of callin’ me names
I would explain why I’m shakin’ and I’m goin’ insane
My mind is on vacation, lack of conversation
I’m like a radio with static on every station
Still I wanna know will I be normal again?
You say it’s bullshit and tell me that it’s all pretend
But if it’s false…
Then why don’t the demons just disappear?
And if it’s untrue…
Then why am I seein’ ‘em crystal clear?
Because I do…
The mirror’s turnin’ blue
And soul after soul keeps walkin’ right through
They’re livin’ in my house and livin’ inside my head
Some sleep in the closet, others sleep under the bed
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’s is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
All I wanted to be
Was a member of a family with unity
But the people that’s alive will stab you straight in the back
And throw a stick in the spokes and flip you offa the track
If it wasn’t for Monoxide and Violent J
That nigga Jack, Shaggy 2 Dope and Blaze Ya Dead Homie
I probably woulda given up and callin’ it quits
I probably wouldn’t be here
I probably wouldn’t be shit
I find myself lookin’ back at the glass
And reminisce on the times of the present and past
I’m feelin’ strange…
I wonder if they can save me?
I’m feelin’ cold…
I’m standin’ in front of the gateway
Well here I am…
I’m such a crazy man
I’m tryin’ to control my life the best that I can
But the demons are around me tryin’ to stray me away
I thank god that I’m standin’ right here today
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Something’s wrong inside my head
Is it really my fault?
I can’t be alone
Is it really my fault?
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Somethin’ is wrong with me
I can’t be who I need to be
Somethin’ is wrong with me
With an axe for eternity
Lyrics submitted by Harbinger24
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P.S.
Please post and tell me if you think I'll right or if you think I'm crazy, but I do know the occult will make you go crazy if you get into it.