I used to be a farmer, and I made a living fine,
I had a little stretch of land along the CP line
But time went by and though I tried, the money wasn't there
And bankers came and took my land and told me "fair is fair"
I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no
"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go!"
The government, the promised me a measly little sum
But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum.
Then I thought, who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone?
I'm gonna be a PIRATE on the river Saskatchewan!!!
(Arrr! Arrr! Arrr! Arrr! Arrr!!)

Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

Well, you'd think the local farmers would know that I'm at large
But just the other day I found an unprotected barge
I snuck up right behind them and they were none the wiser,
I rammed their ship and sank it and I stole their fertilizer!
A bridge outside of Moosejaw spans a mighty river
Farmers cross in so much fear their stomachs are a-quiver
Cause they know that TRACTOR JACK is hiding in the bay
I'll jump the bridge and knock them cold and sail off with their hay!

Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

Well, Mountie Bob he chased me, he was always at my throat
He'd follow on the shoreline cause he didn't own a boat
But cutbacks were a-coming and the Mountie lost his job
And now he's sailing with us, and we call him Salty Bob!
A swingin' sword, a skull and bones and pleasant company
I never pay my income tax and screw the GST (SCREW IT!!)
Prince Albert down to Saskatoon I'm the terror of the seas
If you wanna reach the co-op, boy, you gotta get by me!

Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Arrrr, Metis! Get it? Matey? (Hey, that's Riel-ly funny! You know, Louis Riel?)

Well, Pirate life's appealing but you just don't find it here,
I've heard that in Alberta there's a band of buccaneers
They roam the Athabaska and sail to Fort McKay
And you're gonna loose your stetson if you have to pass their way!
Well, winter is a-comin' and a chill is in the breeze
My Pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze
I'll be back in springtime but now I have to go
I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexico!

Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores...


Lyrics submitted by Queen Vegeta

The Last Saskatchewan Pirate song meanings
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6 Comments

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  • 0
    General Comment

    This was the first arrogant worms i heard, and i just 'oh man, this. is. so. cool...' it's pretty hilarious.

    Grimsonon March 08, 2003   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    Any American (such as myself) will learn more about Canada from this song than we ever learned in school. Canadian pirates rock!

    pinbackon August 06, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    This song brings back some good memories. I went on a canoe trip this past summer in the boundary waters of Canada and Minnasota. We would sing this song at least 5 times each day, it was so great. Pirates kick ass.

    Test For Echoon December 08, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    i love the "I never pay my income tax and screw the GST" part of the song it rocks!

    ShankTheDarkon March 19, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    The best part about this song, that has to be kept in mind... is that Saskatchewan is a land-locked province. It doesn't touch any oceans at all.

    This is a large part of why it's so amusing.

    Instead of being a pirate on the high seas... he's a pirate going down a river, in the middle of an agricultural area, so is essentially pirating prairie farmers, instead of actual boats.

    It's absurd, but just about right.

    Katsunion April 15, 2011   Link
  • -1
    General Comment

    i love captain tractor's cover of this song.

    violenticecreamon September 25, 2004   Link

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